Harry Potter and the Accidental Animalification
by Chakat StarDust
Summary: Harry and the others retake seventh year at Hogwarts at Hermione's insistence. When the new Defence against the Dark arts teacher accidentally casts a spell over the entire school, they know their year is going to be as interesting as every other was.
1. Chapter 1

Star: First story in the Harry Potter fandom, hope you all enjoy. I own nothing but the plot, and the OC that will be showing up, so let's get on with the story!

Hermione had convinced them to go back for their seventh year. Harry and Ron were not going to do it, on account of Kingsley Shacklebolt saying they could become Aurors without graduating, thanks to their efforts in the final battle and the days leading up to it. Hermione was… persuasive, however, and they had finally agreed.

"It's not too bad, I suppose." Ron commented as they got on the Hogwarts Express. "Suppose it's one more year away from the real world, not having to worry about rent and all that, though you wouldn't have to worry about that." He added, looking at Harry. Harry brushed tangled black hair out of his eyes and nodded his head slightly.

"Neville's coming too, did you hear?" He said to the redhead.

"Blimey, did Hermione get to all of our classmates?" Ron asked.

"Wouldn't be surprised if she did." Harry laughed. Just then Hermione showed up, her bushy brown hair bouncing, Luna and Neville in tow. "Hullo Neville, hullo Luna." Harry said happily.

"Hello Harry." Neville said, smiling back. Harry could feel the confidence radiating off his friend and remembered that not that long ago Neville had been shy and timid. The war had changed them all, but it had showed Neville why he was a Gryffindor. Neville casually slung an arm around Luna's shoulders as they sat down.

"Hello Harry, daddy sends his apologies." Luna said dreamily. "I think he was under the influence of Dark Dimplies, they make you paranoid and scared."

"I don't think he needed them to feel that." Harry pointed out. "Death Eaters are plenty scary on their own."

"Oh, I suppose." Luna replied. "It helps to think of them in their underwear."

Ron snorted a laugh. "Can you imagine old He-Who-Is-Now-Dead in his underwear?" He asked.

"That's not particularly something I'd like to think about Ronald." Hermione replied primly.

"Where's Ginny?" Luna asked.

"The loo." Harry replied. "Should be back any minute. So who do you think is going to be the new Defense teacher?"

"Oh, I know." Luna replied happily. "She's my cousin, well, second cousin, but I don't think it really matters."

"What's her name?" Hermione asked eagerly.

"Amynta Lyte." Luna replied. "She's quite brilliant you know, she's been working on new spells for most of her life."

"What kind of spells?" Neville asked with obvious interest. Ron and Harry shared a look; they'd both been there and knew the symptoms. Neville had it bad for Luna.

"I don't know." Luna replied dreamily. "She keeps them quite secret."

"Well if inventing a spell is anything like inventing a new machine or something I would assume she wouldn't want the idea stolen and her work being credited to someone else." Hermione said practically. "Do people who make new spells get some kind of monetary reward for doing so?"

"I guess, if it's useful." Ron shrugged. "Never much thought about it to be honest."

"You don't think about a lot of things, Ron." Ginny said as she came back in. Ron made an ugly face at her. "You do that too much and it will stick that way." She said sweetly.

"Who says it hasn't already?" Harry joked, laughing as Ron punched him in the arm.

"You know, after everything that's happened I think it might be actually good to just have a normal year at Hogwarts." Neville said hopefully. "Might do us some good."

"And this time, with the Dark Wanker out of the way, we should have a normal year." Ron said.

"Be careful, Fate likes to play jokes." Luna said.

"What, you mean I might jinx it?" Ron said with a chuckle.

"Well, you know what they say about Karma." Hermione replied.

"Actually I don't." Ron said. Hermione just rolled her eyes. The train started to slow and so they all scrambled to get their robes on. "You have to admit though, the chances of a normal year are pretty good."

"Well, Harry's around, and there's always something when it comes to Harry, isn't there?" Neville pointed out.

"Don't remind me." Harry moaned, fixing his tie. Ginny reached over and flicked hair out of his eyes.

"Cheer up." She ordered. "No more Voldemort, no more Death Eaters and no more Ministry breathing down your neck."

"That's true." Harry admitted. "Maybe it will be a normal year after all."

"After everything we've been through I'm not even sure what a normal year means." Hermione sighed.

"A year where you don't get your studying interrupted." Ron joked. Hermione whapped him on the arm with her book, and shook her head.

"You're dating him, Hermione." Ginny reminded her.

"I know." Hermione said in a tone of utmost patience.

"Hey!" Ron protested. Hermione shut him up with a kiss on the cheek. The train stopped and they all disembarked. Harry and Luna patted the thestrals on their sides as they got into the carriage. "You know they're really not that bad." Ron commented as they got going. "Bit skinny, but they're not as bad as some of Hagrid's pets have been."

"They're quite friendly, especially if you bring meat for them." Luna replied. "Only raw of course."

"Of course." Ron said, looking vaguely nauseated.

"Do you know where they roost?" Neville asked with interest.

"Yes, I visit them often." Luna replied.

"Could I join you sometime?" Neville asked. Luna gazed at him for a moment with pale eyes.

"If you'd like." She finally said. Neville grinned and ducked his head, failing to hide a light flush creeping up his neck. They rode the rest of the way in silence. The castle had been repaired, but Harry could still see the battle scars from that fateful day in May. He closed his eyes as a wave of sorrow washed over him. They had lost so many that day, so many people he knew and cared about. A hand found his and squeezed. He opened his eyes to look at Ginny and smiled slightly. She smiled back, but her eyes were sad.

The Great Hall was as it always had been, except with Professor McGonagall in the Headmaster's seat instead of Dumbledore. Correction, thought Harry, no Professor Snape either. The new Professor, staring vaguely at the ceiling studded with stars, had light brown hair cut in a short little pixie cut, pale skin dotted with freckles and mismatched plaid robes on.

"Definitely related to Luna." Ron murmured as they took their seats. Harry looked around and noticed that there were fewer students at the Slytherin table, and most people seemed to be giving them uneasy or hostile looks. Malfoy was among them and he met Harry's eyes for a moment and then looked away. "Slimy git." Ron muttered.

"He didn't give us away at the Malfoy manor." Hermione reminded him.

"Okay, so he's not a complete toe rag, but he's pretty close." Ron said darkly.

"Well so long as he leaves us alone, I'll leave him alone." Harry said and then fell silent as the Sorting started. Once it was done Professor McGonagall stood up.

"Good evening students and welcome." She said, her voice steady and calm. "Welcome to our new students and welcome back for those returning. I am glad to see so many familiar faces, and saddened to see empty places where others once sat. I will not make speeches on the Battle, that has been done enough. We are here to learn and here you will learn all that it takes to live in our world of magic. This year our Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher will be Amynta Lyte, who was an independent researcher of defensive spells. Now then, be warned that the Forbidden Forest is strictly out of bounds, Filch has a list of items that is contraband and…" She paused. "The Ministry wishes me to warn you that Dementors have been sighted almost everywhere so be wary."

The Dementors, no longer bound to the Ministry, or Voldemort, had taken to wandering, so it wasn't quite as likely to run into one, but they were on the loose. Harry thought they needed something other than the Patronus to get rid of them, since little kids and people who weren't so powerful would not be able to perform the spell.

"In conclusion I say this, nitwick, blubber, oddment and tweak!" McGonagall said and then sat down. Food appeared on Harry's plate, but he sat for a moment in silence, remembering that Dumbledore had said those words first.


	2. Chapter 2

Star: I own nothing!

"Care of Magical Creatures and then Defence first thing, should be interesting, what with a relative of Luna running things." Ron commented through a mouthful of toast. Hermione was giving him that look again, the one that suggested she didn't understand the workings of her own mind again. Harry chuckled softly, it was nice to see everyone acting normally.

Normal was relative these days though. A normal day was one that none of them had had nightmares the night before and had actually slept through the night. A normal day was where none of them started panicking because someone had been gone for a little longer than they said they would be. A normal day was one where they could laugh without worrying that it would turn into something else.

Harry stole a glance over at the Slytherin table, not sure why he was bothering, maybe it was because Malfoy wasn't making any comments at him like usual. Malfoy looked like he hadn't slept and was just picking at his food while Blaise tried to engage him in conversation. Malfoy looked up and saw him looking and sneered at him. Harry turned away; that was a little bit more like Malfoy.

"Shame we have Defence with the Slytherins, at least we don't have Potions with them anymore." Ron said.

"At least try to be civil, Ronald." Hermione sighed.

"What? Did I say I wasn't going to be?" Ron demanded.

"No, but we know you." Ginny countered. Ron scowled at her. "You've got a bit of egg on your chin." Ginny replied primly. Ron rubbed at his chin, still glowering at his younger sister. "I'll see you at lunch then." Ginny said, sneaking a kiss from Harry and heading out of the Great Hall.

"Please don't go snogging my sister all the time, it's embarrassing." Ron said.

"Like you and Hermione don't snog in inappropriate places, like, oh I don't know, the middle of a war." Harry replied.

"Boys." Hermione muttered, rolling her eyes. "Come along you two, don't want to be late for Hagrid."

"Right." Harry said. Ron stuffed one last sausage in his mouth and the three of them headed out to Hagrid's hut. There were patches of grass that hadn't grown back in from the battle and random bits of stone buried halfway in the ground, a reminder that the seemingly peaceful school had recently been a battleground.

"Look at Grawp." Hermione suddenly said. Harry looked where she was pointing and saw Hagrid's half-brother sitting at the edge of the lake, playing paddy-cake with the giant squid?

"They took a liking to each other over the summer." Hagrid explained when they got to his hut. "A little early, aren't you three?"

"We wanted a chance to say hello before class." Harry explained. "How have you been doing?"

"Good, good. Taking care of Grawpey and Buckbeak, he got himself injured in the battle you know." Hagrid said, nodding at the hippogriff in his garden. "His wing's all better now, so you can have a fly when you want to."

"Great, Hagrid." Harry replied as the rest of the Gryffindors and Slytherins filed out of the castle and to Hagrid's hut. Harry walked up to Buckbeak, bowing politely. Buckbeak clicked his beak in what sounded like amusement and bowed back.

"Is that the creature that savaged me?" He heard Malfoy demand.

"Only after you provoked him, Malfoy." Harry said. "Though you always conveniently forget that, doesn't he, Buckbeak?" Harry petted Buckbeak's feathers, earning a croon of satisfaction. Malfoy looked like he was going to say something, but Zabini placed a hand on his shoulder and he shut his mouth instead.

"You bow first to them, right?" The tall, dark-skinned boy said in a deep, melodious voice.

"Er, yeah. If he bows back you can approach him, if not, just don't." Harry explained. Zabini nodded his head and bowed elegantly. Buckbeak cocked his head back and forth, bright, raptor's eyes considering Zabini. He crowed then and bowed to Zabini, who stepped forward warily.

"Many Slytherins choose not to fight because they fear having to fight someone they care about, not because they are Dark." Zabini said quietly, for Harry's ears only. "We left because it was to our advantage to leave."

"Even though it made you look like the bad guys?" Harry asked.

"Sometimes someone does." Zabini replied evenly. "Ask yourself this, how many followers would the Dark Lord have gotten if Slytherins weren't considered half Dark already and pushed away because of that?"

"That's a nice theory, but everyone has choices." Harry said coolly.

"Yes they do." Zabini said. He moved away then. Harry hadn't paid much attention to Zabini before. He'd seen him in the Slug Club and thought that he was quietly arrogant, aloof and high-and-mighty, but without the loudness of Malfoy. Still, the war had changed everyone and it might be wise not to prompt any more Dark Lords to be.

"What was that all about?" Hermione asked.

"I'm not really sure, to be honest." Harry shrugged.

"Bloody snakes." Ron muttered. "Probably trying to mess with your head."

"No, I don't think he's the type, besides, he's never had an issue with me before." Harry replied.

"Come on you lot, gather 'round!" Hagrid called. Harry gave Buckbeak an affectionate neck scratch and went to join Hagrid with his friends.

%&%&%&%

"You know that before they had the Snitch they used Golden Snidgets instead?" Hermione asked as they left Hagrid's lesson.

"Yeah, actually, read it in Quidditch through the ages." Harry said. "For once I actually know something." He joked.

"Ha ha." Hermione said. "You still haven't read Hogwarts: A History, though, have you?"

"Of course not, I think you're the only one, besides stuffy old wizards, who have read that thing." Ron teased.

"Says the one who wouldn't read through an entire book if his life depended on it." Hermione said. "Anyways, it was a barbaric practice and-"

"They almost went extinct which is why they are classified as high as they are." Harry finished, feeling pleased to actually be able to explain something.

"Yes, which is why it is so interesting that Hagrid managed to get permission for us to be handling them." Hermione said.

"Well, Hagrid is very gentle, for all his size, wouldn't hurt a flea if he wasn't meaning to." Harry reminded her.

"Of course Hagrid can be trusted with them, I'm talking about us students who maybe shouldn't be trusted with them." Hermione explained.

"So, Defence now, how much do you want to bet the new teacher is as barmy as Luna is?" Ron asked.

"Ronald!" Hermione squawked.

"What? I like Luna's barmyness, and if the new professor is anything like her, it should be at least an entertaining year."

"When isn't it?" Harry asked with a laugh.

"Hopefully not too exciting." Hermione said. The three of them entered the Defence classroom behind Neville, Seamus and Dean, who were all chattering together. The new teacher, Professor Lyte, was at her desk, staring at a scrap of paper and twirling her wand in the air, making a little rain of sparks around her head.

Harry could see now that her eyes were a pale shade of grey and her long lashes gave her a faintly sleepy appearance. She suddenly hummed to herself and sat up straight, pointing her wand in the air while looking at her paper. She whispered something as she brought her wand down. There was a crack, a bright burst of light and then a strange crawling feeling that permeated Harry's entire body. When he blinked away the spots in front of his eyes he stared at the human-sized mouse in plaid robes sitting in the teacher's chair. The creature looked bemused and opened its mouth to say

"Well, that wasn't quite what I had in mind."


	3. Chapter 3

Star: I own nothing!

"Bloody hell." Harry heard Ron say in a tone of awestruck horror. He turned to look at his friend and took a step back at the sight of a brown-spotted white terrier wearing his friend's robes. On closer inspection he saw that the terrier had Ron's mop of red hair. Ron looked like one of the animals you saw in Disney's Robin Hood or The Great Mouse Detective.

"Ron, is that you?" Harry said.

"Have a look at yourself mate." Ron's voice came from the terrier's muzzle. Harry looked down and yelped at the sight of short reddish-brown fur covering his hands. "We've been animalized!" Harry reached up and encountered antlers on the top of his head.

"Ahem!" Harry turned to look at the painting on the wall that had coughed. "The Headmistress has ordered that all students return to their dormitories until told otherwise."

"So much for an ordinary year." Hermione sighed, letting Harry see that she had turned into an otter. "At least the body proportions are still human." She added as they walked away from the classroom and their teacher-turned-mouse. "I can't imagine trying to walk around with an otter's short legs, the tail is bad enough."

"At least you're wearing a skirt, my tail's stuck in my trousers." Ron complained. Harry realized he too could feel his short tail confined in his trousers.

"This is really weird, why do you think it happened?" He asked.

"I think it has something to do with the Patronus." Hermione answered.

"How'd you figure that?" Ron asked, looking around at all the various animals wearing students' robes. "Blimey, looks like the whole school got hit."

"If you'll notice Ronald, the animals that we have been turned into correspond to our Patronus." Hermione said as they approached the Fat Lady.

"Interesting affairs this is." The painting commented.

"Bibbling bluebells." Ron said.

"Mind those antlers of yours." The Fat Lady said to Harry, swinging open. Harry ducked as he went through, worried his antlers would indeed scrape the ceiling.

"She's right Ron, I mean look at us." He said.

"Not just you, all of us." A bright red fox with brown hair said.

"Seamus?" Ron asked.

"Aye, it's me." Seamus drawled, grinning. "Figured it'd be a normal year, but with Harry here I guess it just jinxes things."

"Yeah, sorry about that." Harry said, scratching his head. Seamus shrugged.

"It makes life a little more interesting." He admitted. There was a thud behind Harry as someone tripped through the portrait hole. He turned and was nose to nose with an enormous lion.

"Harry, is that you?" The lion asked, sounding a lot like…

"Neville?" Hermione gasped.

"Yeah, it's me." Neville said, somehow managing to look sheepish and apologetic. "Pretty cool, right?"

"Makes perfect sense." Hermione said. "Neville you're basically the quintessential Gryffindor, you proved that last year especially."

"I'm really glad I've got fur now, 'cause you can't see me blushing." Neville joked. "Think I saw the new Defence teacher scurrying up to McGonagal's office."

"Scurrying is the right word, considering she's been transformed into a mouse." Ron laughed.

"So does anyone know what's going on?" Ginny's voice inquired as the portrait hole swung open to admit her. Harry stared; of course she was a horse, he knew she would be but it was one thing knowing and another actually seeing. Ginny was a strawberry roan, with white fur on her hands and wrists like ladies' gloves.

"The Defence professor was doing some kind of spell and it backfired, doing this to everyone." Harry explained.

"Anyone seen Malfoy yet?" Ron asked. "I'll bet he's a stinking little ferret."

"Ronald." Hermione scolded, sounding resigned.

"Do you think we'll actually have classes after this?" Dennis Creevey, who was a very fluffy hamster, asked.

"I don't see why not." Hermione sniffed. "I don't think this effects our ability to do spellwork or potions. I've seen a couple birds, but they've got hands, which are a little more claw-like and their wings on their backs."

"So like a griffin on its hind legs then." Ginny supplied.

"Exactly." Hermione nodded briskly. Ron fidgeted.

"What's wrong, mate?" Seamus asked.

"My bloody tail, is what's wrong." Ron replied.

"Pop the seam on your trousers, let it out." Seamus replied. "That's what I did." He turned around to reveal his fluffy red tail sticking out of his trousers.

"That's a good idea!" Ron declared. "Hermione, could you give me a hand? I'd rather not chop my own tail off."

"I'd say you were being silly, but you actually might do something like that." Hermione said, shaking her head and taking her wand out.

"Do you want me to help you with your tail?" Ginny asked.

"I'll do it later, it's only a little tail after all." Harry answered.

"True." Ginny agreed, reaching up and tugging on one of Harry's antlers, a wide grin on her face. Harry retaliated by lightly yanking on her mane.

"Is it weird that I still find you pretty like this?" Harry asked.

"Only if it's weird that I think you've still got some of that handsomeness to you like this." Ginny shrugged.

"Oi, no flirting." Ron complained.

"I'm only following your example, Ronniekins." Ginny answered sweetly. Ron grumbled and made a rude gesture at her. "Charming." Ginny commented.

"So, what do we do right now?" Harry asked.

"I'm going to get ahead in my reading." Hermione declared.

"Of course you are." Harry and Neville said at the same time. Neville grinned at him, which was slightly frightening due to the mouthful of very sharp teeth he now sported.

"Blimey, Nev, you trying to give someone the screaming meemies?" Ron asked.

"Sorry." Neville ducked his head. "You think Luna will be okay with it?"

"Why wouldn't she be?" Ginny asked.

"Her Patronus is a hare, isn't it?"

"It is, but this is Luna we're talking about, she's brave as any Gryffindor and clever enough to know you won't hurt her." Hermione replied. She was looking down at her hands. "I'm going to have to relearn to hold a quill." Harry noted then that she had webbing between her fingers, and probably her toes as well.

"If anyone can do it, you can." Ron told her. "You're not the smartest witch of our age for nothing."

"Flattery will get you nowhere, Ron Weasley." Hermione was smiling though. Harry decided to go up to the dormitories and figure out now how he was going to manage to get in and out of his shirts with those massive antlers on his head.


	4. Chapter 4

Star: I own nothing!

They were all called down to take lunch in the Great Hall. Harry spotted Luna, her large ears festooned with earrings. He spotted Malfoy, who was a Siamese cat. Fitting, he supposed. Cats were smart, vain, high maintenance, sneaky and not as dignified as they liked to think. He thought the dark-feathered eagle beside Malfoy might be Blaise. McGonagal was of course a tabby cat, Trelawney was a bat, Slughorn was a walrus, Flitwick a hummingbird, Professor Sprout a mole and Hagrid a bear.

McGonagal stood and waited for quiet. "At this time we do not know how to remove the spell that has been placed upon the entire school by Professor Lyte." The professor in question didn't look too concerned by the turn of events. "We will, of course, be working on the counterspell. In the meantime classes will resume as usual, as will trips to Hogsmeade. Please be advised that your new forms may cause damage to the school, each other and yourselves, so be careful."

"You know we can't be seen in the Muggle world like this." Hermione said.

"It's not a problem for most of us." Ron said.

"Yes, Ronald, but some of us have family who are Muggles." Hermione reminded him, whiskers twitching in what looked like irritation.

"Right, well you wouldn't be seeing them until Christmas anyways, and they could come to the Burrow." Ron suggested. "I doubt this will last longer than this year." Hermione's face softened.

"Oh I hope so." She sighed. "Much as I do like otters, I don't fancy being one for the rest of my life."

"I just hope I don't get fleas." Ron muttered.

"The antlers are going to be the worst part for me." Harry said.

"You could cut them off." Ron suggested.

"I think that might be a little painful." Ginny interjected. "Besides, I like them. The markings around your eyes like spectacles are cute too."

"I am not cute." Harry protested. Ginny grinned.

"You are adorable." She cooed teasingly. Harry thought about silencing her with a kiss and then realized something.

"How are we supposed to snog like this?" He asked. Hermione shook her head, looking exasperated.

"Boys, is that all you can think about?" She demanded.

"No, sometimes it's food." Ron replied.

"Or quidditch." Harry added.

"You think it's too late to ask for another one?" Ginny asked Hermione with a laugh.

"Well I did get mine out of the bargain bin." Hermione replied.

"Oi!" Yipped Ron. Hermione chortled at him, the sound squeakier than usual.

"We have Potions next." Ron reminded them.

"Be careful not to shed in the potion, Ron." Hermione said. "We'd better get going."

"Why didn't she remind you not to shed in the potion?" Ron demanded. "Why is it always me?"

"Because you're a dog and dogs shed the most." Neville suggested practically.

"What you don't think lions shed?" Ron asked.

"Lions are too noble to shed." Neville grinned.

"Oi, don't do that, I feel like you're going to eat me." Ron said. If anything this made Neville grin wider. "I think I liked you better as a jelly-legged little blighter."

"Too bad for you." Neville replied.

"Why does everyone go after me?" Ron moaned.

"Because you make it so easy." Harry answered. "So, what do you think about the professors' changes, Hermione? If it does have something to do with their Patronuses it should give clues to their personalities too."

"That is true." Hermione said. "Let me think, Mcgonagal is obvious, so let's go with Flitwick. If I'm remembering correctly hummingbirds are said to represent a light, happy spirit, one that flows with the circumstances in their lives and can be playful. Humminbirds are also quite small, but very important as well and are difficult to catch. Flitwick is a master dueler, if you recall, so he wouldn't be easy to defeat."

"Hagrid's is pretty obvious." Harry said. "Bears are very big, very intimidating, but they prefer not to attack if they don't have to, and they'll jealously guard anyone they consider their cubs."

"I've heard that certain North American tribes consider bears to be a symbol of love, which also fits quite nicely." Hermione added.

"Trelawney's is because she's absolutely batty." Ron muttered.

"I would agree with you, but there's also the fact that a lot of people think bats can't see, but really they just see differently, like Trelawney being a Seer, if a dreadful one most of the time." Hermione said.

"What about Slughorn?" Harry asked. "Big and kind of slow, I can see."

"Well, male walruses have harems, the more females a male has the more status he has, and no Ronald, I am not saying Slughorn has a harem, but he does have the Slug Club. He does 'collect' people he thinks will amount to something and that gives him social status." Hermione explained. "Professor Sprout is easy again, spends most of her time in the gardens and is a very down to earth type of person."

"Alright, I guess that works." Ron admitted. "What about the new teacher? She's a mouse."

"It's hard to say, because we haven't really seen much of her yet so we don't really have much to go on in terms of personality." Hermione shrugged her shoulders. "We know she's intelligent and quiet, but that's about it."

"She's also a little barmey." Ron muttered. "Did you see her, she didn't look at all concerned about the fact that she'd turned all into bleeding animals."

"Maybe she is, she just doesn't show it like other people do." Neville said. "Luna's like that." He parted from their group then; Neville didn't take Potions anymore, and was using his extra time to help out Professor Sprout in the greenhouses.

"That is true." Hermione admitted. "I really hope she's taking this seriously though."

"I think she'd be mad, or madder, to not, what with McGonagal breathing down her neck. Swear that woman's Patronus should have been a dragon." Ron chuckled. "Can you believe it though? No Potions with Slytherin for once in our lives."

"Thank heavens for that." Harry said. "I'm surprised Malfoy hasn't said anything already about my transformation, or yours Ron."

"Maybe he's grown up." Hermione suggested. She glared at the indignant snorts that got. "Or maybe he realizes that you could just as easily find things to make fun of due to his new form as well."

"Yeah, that sounds more like the swarmy git." Ron muttered.

"Maybe he just wants to be left alone." Harry said thoughtfully. "Everyone knows his parents were Death Eaters, everyone knows he was supposed to kill Dumbledore. Can't imagine he'd want to make too many enemies out of people this year."

"Well, if it keeps him away from us, I'm not going to complain." Ron muttered. They walked into the Potions classroom and Slughorn immediately brightened at the sight of him.

"Harry, hello dear boy." He said. "I'm surprised you decided to come back, after all, Minister Shacklebolt is willing to make you Aurors without the schooling."

"We felt it was better to finish up school, just in case we changed our minds on our career someday and not everyone was willing to overlook our lack of schooling because we happened to be heroes." Harry replied, seeing Hermione nod appreciatively.

"Well, can't say I'm not pleased to have you in my class." Slughorn said happily. Hermione elbowed Harry in the side and gave him a pointed look.

"Er, professor, I feel I need to come clean about my performance in your class in sixth year, can we talk quietly?" Harry asked. Slughorn leaned in close, looking intrigued. "The book I was given had notes in it, that I used to be as good as I was. I'm fair in Potions, but definitely not as good as I looked in sixth year."

"Well, that is a bit of a disappointment." Slughorn said. "But you are exceptional in so many ways, I suppose seeing that you are not so good in Potions makes you a little more human." He chuckled and waddled to the front of the class to start teaching.


	5. Chapter 5

Star: I own nothing!

Harry woke up with his sheets tangled in his antlers. Attempting to untangle himself resulted in him rolling off his bed, entangling him further in his curtains. He could hear Ron, Seamus and Dean snickering at him.

"Alright you lot, either sod off or help me out of this." Harry said grumpily. There was a great deal of tugging, some of it a bit painful and then he could see again. He glared up at his friends' grinning faces.

"Better watch your head around doors, Harry." Seamus teased.

"Haha, you're hilarious." Harry retorted. "Better watch Dean, beagles hunt foxes."

"Little chasing never did anyone any harm." Seamus shrugged. "How are you going to get dressed now, is my question?"

"Carefully." Harry replied. "And it's not like I don't have button down shirts, they don't need to go over my head." He proved this by pulling on a blue button-down shirt. He'd started buying his own clothes this past summer, so his clothes actually fit as opposed to being Dudley's hand-me-downs. He wondered how much he would terrify his aunt and uncle showing up like this and smirked.

"What you thinking about?" Dean inquired.

"How much I would terrify my aunt and uncle like this." Harry said. "Especially if I did it in broad daylight."

"Well, Hermione would say that violates the Statute of Secrecy," Ron drawled. "But I say that would be hilarious. Didn't you get a letter from that cousin of yours over the summer?" He added.

"I did." Harry replied. It had been strange, just a short little thing, saying Dudley was glad the danger was over. Harry wondered if Dudley was trying to make up for all those years of torment, but then shook the thought out of his head.

"Come on Harry, we're going to miss breakfast." Dean complained.

"Like you lot couldn't go down without me." Harry said.

"Not as much fun, we want to see you get those antlers caught in more things." Seamus replied.

"I know where you sleep at night, and George and… well, George lets me have merchandise for free, on account I got them their big break." Harry said, swallowing past the lump that rose in his throat at the thought of Fred.

"He would, wouldn't he?" Ron said, voice slightly strained. "Can't even give it for his own effing brother though, can he?" Ron grinned, but it seemed like more of a grimace.

"Come on you two, before we eat everything and leave nothing for you." Dean said, clapping both Ron and Harry on the shoulder.

"Right, like you two can compete with Ron when it comes to eating." Harry joked.

"Oi!" Ron yipped, making them all laugh.

%&%&%&%

"It's really quite fascinating." Hermione said as they left Transfiguration.

"What is?" Harry asked blankly. Hermione shook her head. Sometimes she wished she was friends with people who could actually follow her train of thought.

"The spell that's come over us." Hermione said.

"Oh yeah, everyone's an animal, what's not fascinating about that?" Ron said.

"I mean, Ronald, the fact that we are given a bit of a chance to decipher peoples' innermost character without actually having to speak with them, assuming this spell has to do with the Patronus of course." Hermione answered patiently.

"Of course." Ron said, obviously feeling it was better to agree with her than question her further when he didn't quite understand. Hermione felt a swell of aggravated affection. She waited for Ron to work through it himself, knowing he could. "It's not always about character though, the Patronus. Sometimes it's for someone who you feel strongly about."

"It is." Hermione said, pleased by the intelligent answer. It had to be coaxed out more often than not, but Ron did have quite a smart mind when he actually worked at it. "But for Hogwarts, most of us aren't of an age yet that we would form such strong attachments that our Patronus would become something else."

"The professors?" Harry asked.

"I don't know any of the professors who are actually attached to someone in that way, do you?" Hermione queried.

"No, doesn't have to be someone they're in love with though, right?" Harry replied. "I mean, I'm a stag, and my dad…"

"Well, you didn't know at the time that your father was a stag." Hermione said logically. "You didn't really know your father, so the most logical explanation is that you are a lot like your father, and since your mother was a doe, it makes sense you'd be a deer, just like both your parents."

"You have an answer for everything, don't you 'Moine." Ron said adoringly.

"Not everything, just most things." Hermione said happily. She allowed herself to giggle a little when Ron kissed her, but it was mostly because his stiff whiskers tickled her. Hermione saw Harry roll his eyes, but ignored him. It wasn't as though he and Ginny never snogged, though she wondered how that would work now.

She spotted Malfoy up ahead, walking slightly apart from the other Slytherins of his year. It seemed most of them had decided that associating with him wasn't for the best, even though the war was over and the Malfoys had been granted a lesser sentence than other Death Eaters who had been captured. It was probably because they'd given themselves up, and told of places where other Death Eaters would hide, named names, etc.

"Little git." She heard Ron mutter as Malfoy brushed past them, carefully not looking at any of them.

"Come on Ron." Harry said quietly.

"I have to wonder how he feels coming back here." Hermione mused. While she didn't like Malfoy she had to think of where he'd come from. She wasn't about to go make friends with him, not after all the grief he'd put them all through, but she wasn't about to go singling him out, or allowing her friends to single him out, for ridicule. It looked like he was getting enough of that as it was.

"Me too." Harry said quietly.

"You know Luna said that he was trying to help during the last bit of that final battle." Neville said quietly, startling them all.

"You need to make a little more noise when you approach." Hermione admonished. Neville gave them a sheepish grin, which was quite an impressive feat for a lion to accomplish.

"Yeah, been getting that all day." He admitted. "Anyways, she said he wasn't actively going after Death Eaters, but he was preventing them from killing people."

"Probably to make himself look good." Ron muttered. "The battle was turning after all." Neville shrugged his shoulders.

"Luna also said he brought extra food and blankets when she and Ollivander were captured by Death Eaters." He added. "I mean, the worst he's done under his own power was be a prat. I don't think he ever actually wanted to kill anyone."

"Well, he must be a saint then." Ron said sarcastically.

"Oh stop it, Ronald." Hermione said. "Let's just stop talking about Malfoy."

"Yes, please." Harry said.

"Have you thought about getting the DA together again?" Neville asked.

"What's the point?" Harry asked.

"Well, I know the war's over, but it'd be nice to have it, just to have somewhere for all of us to socialize and maybe we could start a Dueling club or something, just to keep the skills sharp." Neville explained.

"That's actually a good idea, Neville." Hermione said. "We could even make it an official club, have McGonagal sanction it."

"Always by the book." Ron teased. Hermione shook her head, knowing full well she'd done many things that were not 'by the book'. But Ron was joking, so she didn't say anything.


	6. Chapter 6

Star: I own nothing!

Harry walked towards the Headmistress' office. "Er, I'd like to talk to Professor McGonagall." He said to the newly fixed gargoyle statue. After a moment it moved aside for him and he was sure it grinned at him. He began to go up and his antlers scraped against the ceiling. He hunched his shoulders and lowered his head, continuing up the stairs. He straightened as he got to the top and promptly caught his antlers in the doorway, wrenching his head back.

"Please try not to destroy my office, Mr. Potter." McGonagall scolded. He could see a small smile curling up the corners of her mouth. "Now, to what do I owe the pleasure?" She asked. Harry held out the piece of parchment detailing the idea for the reinstatement of the DA. She read it and looked up at him. "This is the same club you and your fellows formed in fifth year, is it not?"

"It is, but now we want to make it official." Harry said. "I don't know if the Room of Requirement still works-"

"It does." McGonagall replied. "Though the room in which you found the diadem cannot be called up anymore."

"Well, that's something at least, we can still hold meetings there." Harry said. "We just think it's a good idea to keep skills fresh, you know? I know Voldemort's gone, but someone else come try something and while the spells we learn in class are good we don't get to practice them that much."

"It would also promote school unity as well." McGonagall murmured. "People from all houses doing something together that's not a competition."

"Well, I don't know if anyone from Slytherin will join, but there are members in every other House." Harry said.

"Well, I think it's a good idea." McGonagall said. "Can I trust you to put out a sign-up sheet and announcements on your own?"

"Yes, professor." Harry said. He looked at the portraits behind McGonagall and fidgeted slightly. McGonagall smiled fondly.

"I'll leave you alone for a few minutes." She offered. Harry nodded his head and waited until she was gone to step up to the portraits.

"Hello Harry, might I say, those antlers are quite dashing on you." Dumbledore said, eyes twinkling.

"If you say so, sir, I just think they're a bloody pain in the arse." Dumbledore chuckled. "It's good to see you sir."

"It's good to see you again too, my boy." Dumbledore said. "I get the feeling though, that you are not here to speak with me."

"Yes, sir." Harry said.

"I shall leave you to it then." Dumbledore said, getting up and walking out of the picture frame. Harry took a deep breath and stepped up to the portrait he was really wanting to see. The portrait of Severus Snape studiously ignored him.

"Hello, sir." Harry said, swallowing past the lump in his throat.

"Mr. Potter." Professor Snape said, voice ironic as ever. "I do believe your new look is an improvement."

"You would think so, sir." Harry said, smiling slightly. Snape didn't smile back, though Harry hadn't expected him to.

"What, exactly, do you want, Mr. Potter?" Snape asked, all surliness.

"I just wanted to say thank you, sir." Harry said, the words leaving him in a rush. Snape looked at him then, surprise in his dark eyes.

"Thank you?" He repeated.

"Yes, for everything you've done, especially in the last year or so." Harry said. "It's not easy to have those kind of expectations put on you, I know."

"I suppose you would." Snape said, considering Harry.

"I think my mum would be proud of some of the things you've done." Harry said. "Other things you'd probably get smacked for." The corners of Snape's mouth twitched.

"You would likely be correct in that assumption." He admitted. "Try not to let that admission go to your head, Mr. Potter."

"I'll do my best sir." Harry replied. "Goodbye, for now at least." Snape rolled his eyes and stalked out of frame as Harry turned and walked out of the office.

%&%&%&%

"Blimey there's a lot of people here." Ron muttered, shifting uncomfortably as more and more students filtered into the Room of Requirement.

"I didn't think there would be so many." Neville said.

"There will be many that will drop off after the first few weeks, once they get bored. For now it's something interesting and a way to interact with the heroes of the Second War, but once we get down to work they'll change their minds."

"Do you see any Slytherins?" Harry asked.

"No… wait, I think I see one." Ginny said. "Isn't that that Zabini bloke that Slughorn had in his Slug Club?" Harry looked to where she was pointing and nodded. "And is that…?" Harry shared her surprise as he noticed Malfoy, hunched shouldered and glaring, walking along beside Zabini. The conversation around the room lulled for a moment and then picked up again with Luna starting a discussion on whatever strange animal her father was looking for now.

"I hope this is alright." Zabini said as he reached Harry.

"Of course, the DA is open for everyone." Hermione said. Ron huffed and she smacked him on the back of the legs with her heavy tail. "I suppose this tail's good for one thing." She commented, pleased.

"That hurt, 'Mione." Ron complained.

"Good." Hermione replied.

"Do they always do that?" Zabini asked.

"You have no idea." Harry said, shaking his head. "Thank you, for coming out." He said. He didn't say the other thing, about having enough bravery to rival a Gryffindor by coming out here, but looking into Zabini's amber eyes he found he didn't have to.

"Hopefully others will come if they see we are welcome." Zabini added. Harry turned to Malfoy and opened his mouth.

"Don't bother, Potter, the only reason I'm here is because I was dragged here." Malfoy sneered.

"Well, we'd prefer it if our members are here of their own free will." Neville said. "Makes for a better impression on the professors you see."

"Stick around Malfoy, you might get a chance to duel me and try to win." Harry said, not sure why he was trying to convince the Slytherin. Malfoy's lip curled up, exposing his fangs.

"Is that supposed to be a challenge, Potter?" He demanded.

"If you'd like." Harry replied mildly. Malfoy nodded stiffly and folded his arms across his chest.

"Think we should address them now, Harry?" Ginny asked.

"Probably a good idea." Harry said. "Nev, can you call for silence, you probably got the biggest voice." Neville nodded and took a deep breath.

"Oi! You lot settle down!" His voice boomed out over the room, silencing everyone in an instant.

"Merlin's pants, Neville, are you trying to deafen us all?" Seamus complained, rubbing at his ears.

"Might actually get some peace and quiet around here then." Neville quipped in reply.

"Alright then, thank you all for coming, I see a lot of new faces, which is good." Harry said, his tail twitching in nervousness. He'd never liked talking in front of crowds, he never knew what he should say. "Er, so this is the DA and we're all about teaching Defence. Now I know we actually have a real teacher, so this will be a place to get some practice and some friendly competition to hone our skills."

"For today's meeting we'd simply like to introduce those who will be instructors and get everyone to give in a bit of parchment with their names and things they'd like to work on so that we can form groups." Hermione added.

"The instructors will be me, Harry, Hermione, Luna, Neville, Seamus, Dean, Ernie and Ginny. If anyone else would like to try their hand at being an instructor, come see us before you leave today." Ron said. With that they ended their speeches and let people do as they needed to do.

"I think I'd like to try my hand at being an instructor." Zabini said quietly. "But I think I will wait until people aren't so uneasy around me." He added. Harry nodded his head and the dark-feathered hawk smiled and wandered away.


	7. Chapter 7

Star: I own nothing!

"Another Dementor attack." Hermione sighed, looking through the Daily Prophet.

"Where?" Harry asked, sorting through his mail. He always seemed to have at least five fan letters a day, it was sort of ridiculous.

"Out in Norfolk County." Hermione replied. Harry hummed in understanding, finding a letter from Mrs. Weasley and one that he wasn't expecting. He frowned at the blocky, crooked writing, trying to remember where he'd seen it before.

"Hermione, can you make sure there's no spells on this one. Doesn't look like a fan letter, but I think I've seen the writing before." Harry said. Hermione nodded and tapped the letter with her wand. "It's clean, though there might be something in it, like the Bubotuber puss in fourth year."

Harry very carefully extended his arm with the letter pinched between two fingers and carefully ripped it open with the other. All that fell out was a letter. Ron leaned in and sniffed it. "Don't smell anything on it but a little bit of cologne, probably from whoever sent it." He said. Hermione shook her head. "What? This nose is good for that, might as well use it."

Harry plucked the letter off the table and began to read. "Merlin's pants!" He yelped. "It's from Dudley." He told his friends.

"Really, that fat twit of a cousin of yours?" Ron said.

"He wasn't so bad by the end. Nearly getting Kissed kind of shook him up I think." Harry said. "Though I'm not sure why he would be writing."

"Well, read it and you might find out." Hermione said impatiently.

"Right." Harry said, sheepishly.

_Dear__ Hello Harry, _

_I don't really know__ I know it's probably weird that I'm writing to you but I thought I'd give it a go. __How are you__ Mum and Dad don't know I'm writing, I think they'd be a little __angry__ worried. I just been thinking that maybe we could __get to know__ start over. I know I've been a bit of a __wanker__ tosser, and if you don't want to respond that's okay. Just, how are you? We're all fine here, one year of school, not sure what's after for me. __Hope to hear back from you_

_Dudley_

"He wants me to write, wants to know about me." Harry said. "I suppose it can't hurt."

"Going to tell him about all this?" Ginny asked, brushing her mane out of her eyes.

"Could be fun to get his reaction." Harry replied.

"Should send him a picture, if he doesn't believe us." Neville added. "Too bad we can't see him ourselves, the look on his face would be a laugh." He chuckled, a deep sound coming from the throat of a lion.

"I'll get to it later, right now we have to get to Hagrid's." Harry said. Hermione, Ron, and Neville nodded and packed up. Ginny gave Harry a sneaky kiss as he stood up, her whiskers tickling him.

"Hello you lot." Hagrid bellowed when he saw them. It really was a bellow, with an undertone of a growl, and even louder than before, if that was even possible. Harry saw Buckbeak give Hagrid a reproachful look and wagered it hadn't been the first time Hagrid had been so loud. Buckbeak clicked his beak at Harry when he came close, cocking his head curiously.

Harry bowed and the hippogriff bowed back before sniffing at him and chortling deep in his throat. Buckbeak tugged at Harry's antlers. "Hey!" Harry protested with a chuckle. "Those are attached." He ran his fingers through Buckbeak's neck feathers, earning a soft croon.

"Took him a couple days to trust me again." Hagrid commented. "Can't say I blame him though." He chuckled, looking down at his massive paws with their wicked claws. Buckbeak chirped a greeting to someone behind Harry and Harry turned in time to see Zabini bow.

"Do you think he thinks I'm related to him?" Zabini asked, a thread of amusement in his deep voice as he patted Buckbeak.

"They're very smart creatures, probably just thinks you're some kind odd bird." Hagrid replied. "And he knows your scent so he's probably just wondering what's happened to us all."

"I'm fairly certain we're all wondering the same thing." Harry said.

"Ain't too bad I suppose." Hagrid said, shrugging massive shoulders. "Grawpey wasn't too happy about it at first, but he knows it's me now. I think he's sulking in the Forest 'cause I changed without tellin' him." Hagrid chuckled.

"Grawpey is the giant?" Zabini asked carefully.

"Yes, his name's just Grawp, Grawpey's a nickname." Hagrid said. "He's quite friendly, and I've gotten him past the grabbing at anything that interests him stage. He knows he's not supposed to grab people now." He added quickly.

"He plays with the squid." Zabini commented.

"Yup." Hagrid said cheerfully. "Not the most unusual friendship I've ever seen, which is pretty interesting when you think about it."

"Yes." Zabini agreed.

"It's Zabini, isn't it? Blaise Zabini?" Hagrid said.

"Yes, professor." Zabini replied, smiling.

"You've always been good with the animals, even the strange ones." Hagrid said. "Have you ever considered a career with them?"

"I have no plans as of yet." Zabini replied.

"I'd consider it if I was you." Hagrid said. "You're very calm, even when something's not going right and that's a good trait to have."

"I will… consider it." Zabini said politely.

"Bloody hell." Ron muttered. "What is this tosser's deal?" Apparently Zabini heard him because he turned to regard Ron coolly.

"Some of us know when change is needed." He said to Ron. "Some of us know that to survive we must adapt and change our own ideas about what is proper and what is beneath us." He glanced pointedly at Hermione. Ron growled softly in his throat.

"You can say that you're adapting, but is it all just words?" Hermione questioned. Zabini smiled slightly again.

"You are very clever." He commented. "The truths of many purebloods is that we can be as much sheep as anyone else. We are taught from the cradle to despise and remain 'pure', but do we truly believe it?"

"Like brainwashing." Harry suggested.

"Exactly." Zabini said. "I have had my doubts for some time, as have others, whose names I will not mention. I still need to sleep at night, after all, Slytherins are not kind if they feel they've been crossed."

"We know that from experience." Ron muttered, crossing his arms.

"Indeed." Zabini said mildly. "There may be more Slytherins at the next meeting. I think I can convince some of the younger years to attend."

"That would be great." Hermione said, jumping in before either Ron or Harry could reply. "We'll make sure the other instructors know and do their best to make them feel welcome."

"That would be beneficial." The Slytherin replied, bowing his head to Hermione. "They call you the smartest witch of our time, do you know that?"

Hermione's whiskers quivered and if she'd been human she would have been blushing. "I've heard it a few times." She said, giggling nervously.

"I think they are right." Zabini said, before walking away to rejoin Malfoy.

"Was he flirting with you?" Ron demanded. "I'll bite him if he was, or if he was making fun of you."

"No, Roland." Hermione sighed patiently. "Slytherins can be subtle. He's complimenting me, telling me that he feels the prejudice against muggleborns is false by admitting that I am the smartest."

"Well, you are." Harry pointed out.

"Yes, but what pureblood fanatic would actually admit that?" Hermione questioned.


	8. Chapter 8

Star: I own nothing!

_Harry,_

_Haha. Go on, pull the other one. I have been getting the Daily Prophet though, your friend's dad got me a subscription __I don't think the owls like me much__ and they say that there are still Dementors around. Will they come around here?_

_Dudley_

"Alright, so we need a decent picture for Dudley." Harry said.

"This is why you wanted us to meet early before the DA?" Seamus asked, looking unimpressed.

"Not just this." Hermione assured him. "But this will be the fun part. We're showing Harry's cousin, who's a muggle, just what's happened to all of us here."

"Has he ever seen a magic photo?" Dean asked.

"He's been getting the Daily Prophet, so I imagine so." Harry replied. "How do you set the timer on this thing?" He demanded.

"Honestly." Hermione sighed, stalking over and pushing him out of the way. "Boys."

"Oi!" All the men in the room protested. Hermione's whiskers twitched in what Harry was realizing was an attempt to hide a smile and walked back over. "Now, do try not to look like complete hoodlums." She reprimanded them. The flash went off and Harry, Ron, Hermione, Neville, Dean, Seamus, Ernie, Luna and Ginny were immortalized forever in their animal forms.

"Now then, to business." Harry said. "You remember Blaise Zabini, the Slytherin who came to the DA?" There were murmurs of agreement. "He says he's convinced a few of the younger Slytherins to come out for the DA."

"Great, bunch of little snakes running around." Seamus grumbled.

"Why shouldn't they?" Neville asked, folding his arms and staring at Seamus. "They're a part of the school too, they have the right to join. Anyways, the idea that all Slytherins are bad is stupid, there were plenty of Death Eaters from other Houses, you know."

"I guess so." Seamus said, looking contrite.

"Hermione suspects the stigma against the Slytherin house is what makes so many of them go Dark, it's like when someone is bullied they're more likely to become the bully." Luna said. "If we're nice to them, they won't want to hurt people."

"She's got a point.' Ernie admitted. "Be nice not to have worry about any kind of nastiness this year, even if it's just inter-House rivalries." The others nodded at that. They'd all had enough with fighting.

"So, I want everyone to be on the lookout, making sure none of the kids are being bullied. If you see it, deal with it." Harry told them all.

"No problem Harry." Dean said, giving him a thumb's up. Not long after that the members of the DA began to file in. Zabini was punctual, leading Malfoy and an assortment of smaller students with him. Most looked a little nervous, though some were looking around the Room of Requirement, which was all padded, floors, walls and ceilings today. Harry waited until he was sure most were there and cleared his throat for silence.

"Good afternoon, and welcome back to the DA." He said. "I see we have a few new members, so welcome to all of you. Today we're going to start with a relatively easy spell, most upper years should know it, so you can all help with the younger kids. We are going to be looking at Disarming today." He noticed a hand go up. "Yes?" He asked the little bobcat in Slytherin robes.

"Why are we learning Disarming?" She asked in a clear voice. "Isn't it a silly spell to use if you're in a fight with someone, like a real fight, I mean?"

"That's a very good question Miss…"

"Mary Dunwald." The little bobcat said proudly.

"Well Miss Dunwald, Disarming is good if you don't want to hurt your opponent." Harry said. "Who can think of reasons why you would not want to hurt your opponent in a fight?" He asked the room. A Ravenclaw with the form of a parrot raised their hand. "Yes?"

"If someone you're fighting's Imperioused, and they're actually someone you care about." He supplied.

"Good, good, anyone else?" Harry asked. Another Slytherin, this one a leopard seal with some of its baby fuzz still showing, raised their hand. "Yes?"

"If you were an Auror, and you wanted to question them, it's not a good idea to hurt them beforehand." He said matter-of-factly.

"Another very good answer." Harry said. "Plus, Disarming is easy, and it opens you up to be able to throw another spell at them before they can get their wand, or get out of there if you don't want to fight."

"Like if you know you're outmatched?" Zabini called.

"Exactly." Hermione said. "There's no shame in retreat if it gives you a chance to get the advantage back, remember that."

"Alright, now I need a volunteer to demonstrate the proper way to do a Disarming spell." Harry said. He got an idea, a bit of a wicked one. "Malfoy?" He called.

"What?" Malfoy looked equal parts surprised and annoyed. Harry figured he'd say yes, any chance to stand Harry up, right? After a moment Malfoy snorted and made his way up to the front, flicking his wand out. "I hope you know what you're doing, Potter." He growled. Harry inclined his head slightly.

"Now, the spell is pronounced expelliarmus, along with this motion." Harry said, demonstrating. "Now, Mr. Malfoy will demonstrate exactly what it does." He gave Malfoy a nod.

"Expelliarmus!" Malfoy yelled, the spell neatly plucking Harry's wand from his hand.

"Good, now, while I am struggling to get my wand, Mr. Malfoy can dispatch me with another spell." Harry said. Malfoy frowned at him in confusion and Harry gestured for him to continue, nodding his head.

"Stupefy!" Malfoy yelled, knocking Harry back so that he slammed into the wall and dropped to his knees.

"And that," Neville said cheerfully. "Is why we have padding on the floors _and _the walls." There was a ripple of laughter at his words. "Let's thank Mr. Malfoy for his help and we'll get working on this spell. Older students if you don't mind supervising the younger. We are only using the Disarming spell today, nothing else, if we see anyone disobeying they will be kicked out for the remainder of the lesson."

Clusters formed almost immediately, Harry's friends making sure the groups were mixed Houses, with at least one Slytherin in each. Zabini wandered around, helping out here and there. Harry noticed the younger students were quicker to relax around the Slytherins, but then they'd had less time to build up prejudices.

"I'm surprised you let me do that." Harry turned his head to regard Malfoy, who had come to crouch by him.

"Why?" Harry asked.

"I could have hurt you, killed you even. I'm not your friend, after all." Malfoy pointed out. "So why did you trust me?"

"Well, for one thing I know you're not completely stupid." Harry said. Malfoy bristled, which had the unintended effect of making his fur stand on end, effectively making him look like a large cotton ball. "Most of the people in here would be on you in seconds if you tried anything to me, and you know it. That's why I knew you wouldn't." He didn't say the other reason, which had to do with him with a puffy face and Malfoy failing to identify him.

"Your cockiness will get you killed someday, Potter." Malfoy stated.

"Hasn't yet." Harry shrugged, hauling himself to his feet. He looked around the room, hearing calls of 'expelliarmus' from every corner. "Reckon we won't see anything like this ever again."

"What?" Malfoy said impatiently.

"All four Houses, doing something together that doesn't involve us all trying to kill each other." Harry shrugged. "I hope none of these kids ever have to use the things we'll teach them, not like we had to, anyways." Malfoy looked at him oddly, but didn't comment. After a few moments of silence he slipped back into the crowd.


	9. Chapter 9

Star: I own nothing!

It was Hogsmeade weekend and since no one could think of a real reason why a bunch of students-turned-animals couldn't go, they got to go. So it was a motley assortment of animals that spilled out of Hogwarts, laughing and talking, occasionally making sounds like shrieks, barks and roars when they got too excited. Harry's group included Hermione and Ron of course, but also Neville, Luna and Ginny. Neville was talking about some rare fire-breathing flower with Luna.

"Where do you think we should go first?" Harry asked.

"We should say hello to Aberforth, at least." Ginny suggested.

"Great idea, Gin." Neville agreed with a toothy grin. "Aberforth was a big help to us, it'd be rude to not at least say hello."

So they made their way to the Hog's Head, dodging other groups of students, third years' who had never been and were overexcited about seeing Zonko's and Honeydukes. Hermione shook her head as a group of them whirled by, chattering and yelling.

"What, we were like that once." Ron pointed out.

"Maybe you were." Hermione retorted, sticking her nose in the air. Ron licked her cheek, making her squeak and then smack him on the shoulder. Harry got his antlers caught in the door to the Hog's Head and cursed while rubbing his sore head.

"Don't be chipping the paint." Aberforth said gruffly, though his bright blue eyes twinkled slightly, reminding Harry of his brother.

"Hey Aberforth." Neville greeted. Aberforth eyed Neville for a moment and then nodded his head.

"Heard you lot got turned into something like your Patronus', glad it hasn't effected me." He said.

"I think it would be a little frightening if Professor Lyte's spell could reach all the way here, sir." Hermione replied.

"Professor Lyte, is it? Amynta Lyte?" Aberforth asked.

"Yes, she's my cousin." Luna said brightly.

"Yes, your family always had their own ways of doing things." Aberforth said. "Not that it's a bad thing." He shrugged. "You do get a reputation for being a little odd though."

"Oh, I know." Luna said, completely unconcerned. She plunked herself down at a bar stool and smiled vaguely at Aberforth. He chuckled at her.

"Now if I remember correctly, Amynta was always most interested in how spells worked and why they did what they did." Aberforth commented, starting to make some glasses of Butterbeer for them all. "Got herself sent to the hospital wing a few times for experimenting, but it never seemed to faze her. Any idea of what she's trying to do, Luna?"

"As far as I know she's trying to develop a new spell of some kind, but she's keeping it rather secret, although I haven't seen her much since we got here, besides class, anyways." Luna replied. "There's nothing nasty hanging around her though, so it's not bad what's she's done to us."

"No, just weird." Ron muttered, accepting his Butterbeer.

"Surprised to see all of you back at Hogwarts." Aberforth said idly.

"Hermione made a convincing argument." Harry said. "She pointed out that if we ever went to work abroad there might be some people who aren't impressed with being heroes."

"Which is a load of bullocks." Ron muttered.

"Not everyone likes heroes." Aberforth said patiently. "And there's probably those who are quietly unhappy about what you've all done, so they'd use your lack of education against you."

"See, he agrees with me." Hermione said smugly.

"You've encouraged her, you shouldn't have done that." Ginny commented. Aberforth chuckled and went back to drying glasses. They spent the rest of their visit talking amiably about random things, the weather, what they were doing with the DA, just regular things like that. It was nice to have the time to do that now.

%&%&%&%

Dudley finished the last of his dishes and put them on the rack to dry. He'd learned very quickly after getting an apartment of his own that dishes that didn't get done got smelly extremely fast and were much harder and more disgusting to clean than if he'd done them right off. It was the same with having clean clothes, except they were worse because he had to smell himself if he hadn't cleaned them.

Besides, today his parents were coming over to visit and if his place was a pig sty his mum might try and convince him to move home, saying he wasn't ready to live on his own. He was more than ready, he was sick of being coddled all the time now. It'd been nice as a kid to get everything he wanted and not having to do a thing, but he was almost an adult now, he didn't want his parents hanging over everything he did.

The knock on the door came all too soon and his mum was inside, smothering him with kisses and talking a mile a minute. His dad followed at a more leisurely place, inspecting the walls, running a finger over the counters. He didn't look all too pleased with things, but then he hardly ever looked that pleased with things, Dudley thought.

Just as he was saying that, yes, he was quite comfortable here and, no, the apartment wasn't too small for him there was the sound of something tapping on glass. Dudley bit back a curse and got up, knowing the owls didn't like being kept waiting. They tended to bite more when they were annoyed.

"Duddy-kins, what is that?" His mum asked, wide-eyed. "It isn't ruffians, is it?"

"No, mum, don't worry." Dudley said patiently, opening the window and letting the bird in. A tiny ball of feathers zipped past him and then turned in mid-air, colliding with his chest and then finally lighting on his shoulder, hooting excitedly.

"Is that an owl?" His mum asked timorously.

"I think so." Dudley said, looking over the tiny thing.

"Why would you be getting an owl?" His dad demanded.

"It's probably from Harry." Dudley said without thinking, wincing as he did so.

"Why would that boy be writing you?" His dad asked, sounding angry.

"Well, I started writing him first." The tiny owl bonked its head on his shoulder in what seemed to be an affectionate way as he opened the letter. He ignored his dad's sputtering and began to read.

_Hello Dudley,_

_Since you don't believe me, there's a photo attached of me and my friends. Don't go waving it around in public though, that violates the Statute of Secrecy (that was Hermione's warning, by the way)_

Dudley stopped reading and took out the photo, which showed a crowd of animals shifting and smiling, moving as he watched the picture. One of them, a stag with markings around his eyes like spectacles, waved at him. He continued to read.

_I am the stag, the otter is Hermione, Ron is the terrier, Dean is the terrier, Seamus is the fox, Luna is the rabbit, Ernie is the boar, Neville is the lion and Ginny is the horse. Bet you believe me now, huh? Oh, by the way, sorry for the owl, his name is Pig and he's a bit excitable. _

_Harry_

"An owl named Pig, huh?" Dudley questioned the little creature. It twittered at him and burrowed happily into his neck. "I don't suppose you'd stay long enough for me to write a response?" He asked it. Pig hooted and zoomed over to the tiny kitchen table, perching on one of the chairs and bouncing in place.

"Why are you writing to the boy?" His dad demanded as Dudley looked around for paper and an envelope.

"Wanted to see how he was doing and we just kept going back and forth after that." Dudley shrugged his shoulders. "No harm in that, I mean he did save my life, and he got us to leave before something bad happened to us."

"But he's so… different." His mum said hesitantly, though it sounded like she wasn't at all convinced by her own argument.

"I don't know, he's a wizard, but he's really got the same kind of problems we all have, just more magic." Dudley tried to explain. "I mean it's kind of cool hearing about the things he does."

"Well, if you're sure." His mum said. His dad didn't say anything, and as Dudley quickly scribbled a note back to Harry, he thought the Harry in the picture smiled approvingly at him. 


	10. Chapter 10

Star: I own nothing!

_Hey Harry,_

_So my folks came by and your owl got there while they were still around. Thought dad was going to blow a gasket or something. Mum just seemed confused about why I would be talking to you. We weren't very good family to you, were we? Sorry about that. Anyways, nice picture, and nice antlers, bet you get those caught in everything. Not much exciting for me, taking some extra courses to boost up my grades. I was thinking of going to work as a mechanic, don't think I have it in me to work in an office. By the way, who names their owl Pig?_

_Dudley_

"Dudley doesn't think Pig is a good name for an owl." Harry told Ginny at breakfast after reading his letter.

"Well, some people have no imagination." Ginny replied, looking in particular at Ron.

"Wha?" Ron asked through a mouthful of food. Hermione just rolled her eyes at her boyfriend.

"What else did he have to say?" Hermione asked.

"Well, his parents were over when Pig came in, and that went as well as expected, and he's also apologized for how he treated me." Harry replied. "I kind of figured he had already, with his 'not a waste of space' comment before they left the last time."

"His parents haven't improved though." Ron pointed out. "Think they'll make a lot of noise about their ickle Duddykins writing back and forth with the dirty wizard?"

"He's out of the house, so what can they do about it?" Harry replied. "Do you think we ought to have a duelling demonstration in the DA soon?"

"I think it's a good idea, show the littler ones what it's like being in an actual fight." Seamus said. "Going to bring up Malfoy again?"

"Why would I?" Harry asked.

"He'd be a good one to duel against, you know he's going to go all out on you." Hermione said. "Plus it makes you look good, and him look good for cooperating together."

"If he doesn't do it, get another Slytherin." Dean offered up. "If we're trying to promote inter-House unity, then it's best we show we're not worried about Slytherins."

"The little ones don't seem to have a problem with it." Ron commented. "It's just the older ones, though I don't blame them."

"Gryffindor's picked as many fights with Slytherin as the other way around." Hermione reminded him.

"Yeah, but all the Dark wizards came from Slytherin."

"Wormtail." Harry reminded him in a growl.

"All I'm saying is we should be careful." Ron said mulishly.

"We are being careful, Ronald, it's not like we're agreeing to meet in a darkened alleyway or something." Hermione sighed, exasperated.

"Well, alright, just…" Ron flapped his arms once and then settled down. "I guess none of the Slytherins would be stupid enough to try something in a room full of all of the other Houses."

%&%&%&%

"Alright you lot, who wants to see a proper duel?" Harry yelled out. Immediately there was a roar of approval from the assembled students. "Now, who wants to give me a go? Anyone, anyone at all?" Slowly Blaise Zabini raised his hand, gazing around haughtily. "Zabini, thank you for volunteering."

"It is my pleasure to duel against someone as accomplished as yourself." Zabini replied as he glided up to Harry.

"I don't know about accomplished, I just got lucky." Harry replied.

"As many times as you have escaped, that is not luck." Zabini countered. He walked back ten paces from Harry and bowed, his wings fanning themselves out as he did so. Harry bowed back, careful not to fall under the weight of his own antlers and straightened, assuming a ready stance. Zabini paused for a moment, and then went on the attack.

Harry's focus narrowed to Zabini and the hexes and spells being thrown at him. He was on the defensive, but managed to push back with his own hexes so that for a while Zabini was the one defending himself. Both of them were quite good at dueling and the upper hand wavered between the two of them, until Harry scored with a nasty Stinging hex and toppled Zabini quickly with a Full-Body Bind.

He stood for a few moments to show that he had won and then released Zabini and helped him to his feet. The Slytherin was grinning openly, eyes alight with adrenaline. "Only luck, hm?" He said shrewdly.

"Well, maybe a bit of talent, but I'm not going to go around telling my opponents now am I?" Harry said.

"You would have made a good Slytherin, I think." Zabini said with approval.

"Funny, I've heard that before." Harry murmured, smiling slightly. "Let's give a big round of applause for Mr. Zabini's help!" He called. There was a thunderous amount of applause, which to Harry meant that they'd put on a good show. "You can stay for this next bit if you'd like, I'm just going to be asking a few questions." He murmured to Zabini.

"Now then, what did everyone notice about the duel?" Harry asked. There was silence for a moment. "Come on, it can be anything." He encouraged.

A vole from Ravenclaw raised their hand and Harry nodded. "It's very fast." She said and then hid in the folds of her robes.

"No, that's good, that's very good, you're right, it is fast." Harry said. "What is the significance of that?"

"You don't have a lot of time to think." A Hufflepuff hippo suggested.

"Exactly." Zabini said. "In a duel, or a fight, you don't have a lot of time to consider your next move, unless you're very good at quick thinking, you're working on instinct."

"How do you work on instinct?" A zebra in Gryffindor demanded.

"You practice, over and over again, until the act of performing certain spells is ingrained in your muscles so you don't even have to think when you're attacked, you just do." Harry said. "It's for that reason that many wizards have a particular spell that they favour, one they fall back on."

"Like the Disarming Charm." Zabini said.

"What else do people notice?" Harry asked.

"You're breathing awfully heavily." A pine marten in Slytherin commented.

"Yes, duelling takes stamina, something we probably won't be working on, but you all should consider doing some physical activity, like running, to build up some stamina." Harry said. He noticed Professor Lyte edge into the room and take up a space at the wall. She waved, smiling brightly and gestured at him to continue.

"Okay, so we're going to have you get into partners and try a bit of dueling, nothing serious, harmless hexes and spells. Your partner must be from another House and there will be no Slytherins left out or we will rearrange the groups ourselves." Harry said sternly.

"I'm not working with no snake!" A Ravenclaw yelled.

"Then you can leave." Harry said forcefully. Silence met his words. "This group is for all the Houses, including Slytherin and it is going to be a safe place for everyone. If you can't deal with that, you have no place here."

He saw some of the Slytherins in the crowd staring at him in disbelief, some of them smiling openly. "Alright, now divide into partners, we'll switch it up in a little bit and you will move onto a partner from another House." Neville said.

"Sorry, but why are we duelling partners from different Houses?" Mary Dunwald asked. Harry looked at Zabini and Zabini nodded.

"Different Houses will have different styles of fighting, based on the basic personality traits of the House." Zabini said. "Slytherin will be sneaky, try to trip you, Ravenclaws will be clever, looking for your weak spots, strategizing on the spot, Gryffindors will fight with everything they have, especially when they're protecting someone, and Hufflepuffs will keep coming at you until they die or they overwhelm you. Learning to fight against different styles of fighting will give you an advantage, and what's more, learning to incorporate different styles will be of benefit."

"Right, exactly, so, let's get cracking." Harry said, rubbing his hands together. Professor Lyte nodded approvingly at him and slipped out of the room.


	11. Chapter 11

Star: I own nothing!

"I must say your teaching efforts are quite impressive." Harry looked up at Professor Lyte, who smiled vaguely at him. He was just sitting down for Defense against the Dark Arts.

"Thank you, professor." Harry said. "I saw you sat in for the class."

"Might be good for me to continue to do so, that way I can plan my lessons around things that the students actually need work on." Professor Lyte replied. "You'd make a good teacher someday, you know."

"Well thanks, but I was looking to become an Auror, actually." Harry replied.

"A most auspicious and ambitious career." Professor Lyte said. "Do keep teaching in mind though, I know a great deal of Aurors who feel after so many years that they need a break."

"I will professor." Harry said politely.

"Now, the young man who is currently wooing my cousin, what can you tell me about him?" She asked absentmindedly.

"Nev? He's a good egg." Harry said. "Luna won't come to any harm by him."

"Thought not, the quintessential Gryffindor." Professor Lyte mused.

"So, the spell you did, it does have to do with the Patronus?" Harry asked.

"Hmm, that would be telling, wouldn't it?" Professor Lyte replied distantly. She headed up to the front of the class to start teaching.

"What was that all about?" Ron asked in a whisper.

"She was just commending Harry for his teaching methods with the DA." Hermione replied. "Honestly, don't you listen?"

"Not if I can help it." Ron replied, flicking his ears. "Though I can hear a lot more these days, makes napping a bit more difficult." Hermione snorted at that. "Why haven't you tried swimming like this? Bet you'd have a lot of fun."

"I've been too busy to think of such frivolous things." Hermione sniffed.

"How about we all go for a swim, after Care of Magical Creatures?" Harry suggested. "It's nice out, and it's soon going to start getting cold."

"Yeah, Halloween's on Saturday." Ron agreed. "Two months and we haven't had any problems with the snakes."

"I guess our idea of making them feel welcome is working." Hermione said smugly.

"Or they're laying low 'cause they know we suspect them of being in cahoots with old Snakey-face." Ron muttered.

"Oh Ronald." Hermione said. "It is a good idea, a swim I mean. Do you know what Hagrid's doing for this lesson? He seemed terribly excited when we went to visit him yesterday."

"No idea, Hermione." Harry said. "Hopefully it's nothing like the Blast-Ended Skrewts though."

%&%&%&%

"Gather 'round everybody, gather 'round." Hagrid called, beaming happily.

"Really, Hagrid?" Hermione asked, staring up at the bulk that was Grawp.

"HERMY!" Grawp crowed excitedly.

"Bless 'im, he remembers you!" Hagrid said, pleased. The Gryffindors and Slytherins were muttering uneasily. "Don't worry, he won't hurt anyone. He knows better than to."

"Is this even allowed?" Neville asked.

"Asked the Headmistress myself, I did." Hagrid replied. "So, this is Grawp, and obviously, he's a giant."

"He's a bit small, isn't he?" Zabini pointed out.

"That he is, that he is." Hagrid said. "He was bullied for 'is size too."

"You sure he's not going to squash us?" Malfoy demanded, though he looked more worried than contemptuous. Harry could hardly blame him for wanting to be cautious; he didn't have a good track record when it came to Care of Magical Creatures.

"'Course not." Hagrid replied. "But, to make sure, Grawpy, sit down." He called. Grawp flopped down on his behind, making the ground shake a little. "Good boy." He turned to the class. "Now who can tell me what giants are classified as?"

"Beings, aren't they?" Seamus said. "Hey, didn't this one help us during the last battle?"

"That he did." Hagrid said. "And yes, they are classified as beings, and why is that?"

"Because they are intelligent enough to hold a conversation, if prompted." Hermione replied. "If I remember correctly Grawp does know quite a few words in English."

"Yes he does, knows more now than the last you saw him too." Hagrid chuckled. "Say hello to everybody Grawpy."

"'Ello, errybody." Grawp said dutifully. "All aminals." He commented.

"Yes, all animals, just like me." Hagrid said. He then launched into an explanation about giants' habits, diet and life cycles. Grawp sat where he was, yawning every so often and trying to swat birds out of the air.

"I thought giants were dangerous." Malfoy said.

"Well, think that's mostly 'cause of size, you know? I mean they can be temperamental, but so can a lot of humans, too." Hagrid said with a shrug. "In any case, doesn't hurt to know a bit about giants and know how to be polite to them, now does it?"

"I doubt many of us will be in the position of meeting giants." Malfoy said matter-of-factly.

"Doubt most of you will have to ever care for a unicorn either, but you still learn about it." Hagrid said, calm as can be. The lesson was over not long after that and the trio lingered. Hermione went over and patted Grawp's leg. Grawp leaned down to peer closer at her.

"Hermy mouse?" He asked.

"No, I'm an otter, say otter." Hermione prompted.

"Otter. Hermy otter." Grawp said.

"He only remembers her name, what's with that?" Ron asked.

"I think she made an impression on him." Harry laughed in reply. "She has a talent for that, if you recall."

"Yeah, I suppose she does." Ron grinned. "Come on, 'Mione, I thought we were going to go swimming." He complained.

"We are, just hold on a moment, Ronald." Hermione said. She said goodbye and strode over to them. "I trust you're both wearing swimming trunks under those robes."

"No we thought we'd swim in the buff." Ron said sarcastically. "Give us some credit, 'Mione."

"I try." Hermione replied. She strode to the edge of the water and glared at the two boys. "Turn around."

"'Mione you've got your swimming suit already on, it's not like we're going to see you naked." Ron protested.

"All the same, turn around." Neither boy was willing to argue with her too much and took the time to get out of their own clothes anyways. When they were done Hermione was ready, clad in a modest and practical one-piece.

"Well then, let's go." Ron said, dashing for the water. He struck it with a slap and a yelp that was cut off by water getting in his mouth.

"Honestly." Hermione groused.

"Hey, you chose him." Harry said.

"That's what I keep telling myself." Hermione replied and then waded into the water and ducked under it. Harry followed, keeping his head above the water. Hermione popped up some distance away and dove again, sleek and graceful. An otter really was her. Able to cope in most situations adequately, if with a little bit of fumbling, like an otter on land, but once she was in her element she was off like a rocket, like the otter in the water.

Harry watched her pop up just in front of Ron, who was valiantly doggy-paddling through the water, making him yell and grinned. He swam after them, yanking Ron's tail playfully. Ron went at him with a barking laugh and the three of them cavorted in the water until it was nearly time for dinner.


	12. Chapter 12

Star: I own nothing!

"So, who can tell me what a Patronus does?" Harry asked, looking out over his DA. A pair of first years, a Slytherin and a Hufflepuff were whispering and giggling to each other, until Harry gave them a stern look.

"It makes dementors go away." A Ravenclaw hyena said in a tone of smug superiority.

"Yes, but how does it do that?" The Ravenclaw opened his mouth and then closed it again, looking befuddled. "Now I know you younger kids haven't gotten to Patronuses yet, but with the dementors still around, it's a good idea to teach you how to do it."

"It uses happy memories to create a sort of shield from the dementors." A Slytherin ventured.

"Yes, exactly." Harry said.

"But why has it got to be happy memories?" A little Hufflepuff asked. "Why specifically happy?"

"Because that's what the Dementor's take away, right? It's like you overload them, give them something else to chase after that's not you." A Ravenclaw guessed.

"That's the shield type, yes. The corporeal form is more like a bodyguard, they really protect you." Harry said. "And it can't just be any memory, it has to be the best memory you have, the happiest thing you ever remember." Harry said. "It only works that way."

"Come on then, show us!" A little Slytherin yelled. Harry grinned and stepped back, taking out his wand. He thought of Hermione and Ron and him and Ginny and everyone safe and happy, and the relief of knowing it was finally over. He took a deep breath and shouted at the top of his lungs.

"EXPECTO PATRONUM!" But nothing happened. Nothing, not even the faint wisps of silvery light came from his wand. "EXPECTO PATRONUM!" He shouted again. Still, nothing. He looked back at his friends in confusion. One after another they tried to cast their patronuses with no success. Ripples of murmurs began going through the assembled students and Harry could distinctly hear an undertone of fear.

"Okay, we're going to cut this meeting short." Hermione called, cutting through the chatter. "We're going to go to McGonagall, she'll know what to do." The students filed out, still murmuring softly in confusion.

"We'd better go tell McGonagall right away." Hermione said. Harry nodded in agreement. "I don't suppose the rest of you would be willing to go to the library to see if there's any mention of something like this happening before?" She asked. Ron groaned and she glared at him.

"Fine, it'd be better if you were around though." He said sulkily.

"It shouldn't take too long to explain to McGonagall, then I will come to the library." She gave him a quick peck on the cheek and then she and Harry hurried off.

"You reckon it has something to do with this?" Harry asked, gesturing to his antlers.

"I think that would be a fairly safe assumption." Hermione agreed. "But maybe it had something to do with the Room of Requirement, I don't know. We need to talk to McGonagall first."

"Right." Harry agreed. "Do you know the password?" He asked her.

"No, but we can ask one of the paintings to tell her we need to see her." Hermione suggested. She turned to the nearest painting, a depiction of a boar hunt.

"Or…" Harry thought for a second. "KREATCHER!" He yelled. There was a pop and the old elf was standing in front of him. Kreatcher blinked at him a couple times and then bowed.

"Yes Master Harry?" He asked politely.

"Can you pop into the Headmistress' office and let her know we're coming? It is urgent." Harry asked.

"Of course Master." Kreatcher croaked and vanished with a snap.

"He's handy to have around, isn't he?" Hermione commented.

"Yeah, now that he's not acting so crazy or trying to spit on you." Harry chuckled. "You think I should invite Dudley to Christmas?"

"Well, you have been talking back and forth with him quite a bit." Hermione replied. "It would probably be polite and you could actually talk face-to-face. What were you thinking of doing for the holidays anyways?"

"Well there's the Burrow of course, and I can stay at Grimmauld Place and we can have a party there with friends from Hogwarts for maybe New Year's." Harry shrugged. "Hadn't really thought about it much, I mean it's still a month away. I'd rather not stay at Hogwarts though, especially if everyone else is going home."

"Well, Molly's going to be having us all around for Christmas eve, since Fleur's family wanted her for Christmas day and my parents have something planned for Christmas day too." Hermione said, keeping a brisk pace. "So he could come to that, and to the New Year's eve party if you really want to host it."

"I think it would be great. Might as well put the old place to some good use." Harry joked. It was hard going back to Grimmauld Place. So many ghosts there; but maybe a party could banish them, after all it was his house.

They had come to the gargoyle marking the Headmistress' office and the staircase was already waiting for them. They headed up and McGonagall was waiting for them, eyes narrowed. The fact that she was furry did not diminish her severe, sharp demeanour and the slit-pupil eyes only served to make her a little more foreboding.

"I will assume you have a good reason for having your house elf interrupt my tea." She said.

"We wouldn't bother you otherwise, professor." Harry said.

"Of course not." McGonagall conceded. "What is it, Miss Granger, Mr. Potter?"

"It's our Patronuses, professor, they're not working." Hermione said urgently.

"Well, everyone can have a bad day." McGonagall replied.

"It's just us two, it's all of us that tried just now, all the instructors in the DA, none of us can make a Patronus, not even a wisp of one." Harry explained. McGonagall gave them both serious looks. "Look." Harry tried to cast a Patronus and failed again, feeling miserable and a little bit scared.

"Considering your affinity for this particular spell, this does surprise me." McGonagall took out her own wand and tried to cast a Patronus, but failed in the same way everyone else had. "Well, this is a problem. Albus, have you ever seen anything like this?" She asked Dumbledore's portrait.

"No, and I don't say that often." Dumbledore said gravely. "Severus, can you think of any potions or Dark Spells that might cause this?"

"I am afraid not, though I would wonder if it would have something to do with the spell already on the castle." Snape replied slowly.

"That would be a logical assumption." Dumbledore agreed.

"Wonderful, as if having antlers isn't bad enough." Harry muttered.

"This is a tricky situation, of that there is no doubt." McGonagall murmured. "How many students know for the moment that this is happening?"

"Everyone in the DA." Harry replied.

"So the whole school will know by dinnertime." McGonagall sighed. "I shall have to make an announcement, and find that professor." She hissed slightly. "Why can't we ever have a normal year with you around?" She asked.

"Just lucky I guess?" Harry supplied. She gave him a look of amusement.

"Away with you both." She told them.

"Thank you professor." Hermione said politely. She and Harry turned to go.

"Well, it's official, we can't escape being the cause of everything interesting." Harry muttered.

"Well, it wasn't our fault this time, it was the professor's." Hermione protested.

"I doubt anyone will think of that." Harry chuckled. "It'll be another case of 'Harry Potter makes the school year more interesting than it ought to be'." Hermione laughed a little at that. "You do have to admit I attract trouble."

"And somehow I still remain friends with you." Hermione replied, tugging his antler affectionately.


	13. Chapter 13

Star: I own nothing!

"So, Christmas hols and still no word on how to get this spell off." Ron groused as they tramped through the snow to their Apparation spot in Hogsmeade. "And Dementor sightings not 20 miles from Hogsmeade. What are we supposed to do if we can't cast a Patronus?"

"Honestly Ronald, that's why the Ministry sent Aurors to guard the boundaries of Hogwarts." Hermione said, rolling her eyes. "And you really think that Kingsley would send anyone rubbish to do that?"

"Na, not Shacklebolt, he's a good one." Ron admitted. "Still, I'd be happier if we could use our Patronuses, you know."

"We all do." Ginny replied. They'd come to their Apparation point and she stopped in front of Harry. "So you're bringing your cousin to Christmas eve?"

"Yeah, should be interesting. He's only ever seen little bits of accidental magic and some magic from the Order but a whole magical house, that should completely blow him away." Harry said with a grin. "And then there's the party at Grimmauld place on New Year's…."

"Hermione and I will come by early to help get things set up." Ginny said. "Hermione will probably drag Ron along."

"And he'll complain and moan until he finds out there's cookies or cake, like usual." Harry said.

"You sure you don't want to come right to the Burrow?" Ginny asked.

"I could use a couple days to myself. Only way I'll get some of my homework done." Harry said with a grin.

"Okay, I'll see you soon then." Ginny said, nuzzling his neck softly. Harry grinned and blew her a kiss ad then Apparated away.

"Young Master Harry, so good to see you." Kreatcher said, pausing in his dusting. "How has young Master Harry come to be like this, if Kreatcher may ask?"

"Spell went wrong, affected the whole school." Harry replied. "Er, my cousin Dudley is going to be staying here for a little while. He's a muggle. I trust that won't be a problem, will it?"

"Of course not young Master Harry." Kreatcher said after a moment of silence.

"He might be a little wary of you, he hasn't had much experience with magic, so just… try not to scare him." Harry said.

"Of course young Master Harry." Kreatcher said. "Is there anything in particular that Kreatcher can prepare for you tonight?"

%&%&%&%

Dudley sat in his kitchen, bag full of clothes and other essentials. He was just going for the night this time, and Harry would bring him back tomorrow so he could see his family for Christmas, and then he was going back to Harry's until New Year's. He wasn't telling his parents where he was going, just saying he was spending time with friends. They didn't need to know anything else but that.

There was a banging noise and suddenly Harry, fur, antlers and all, was there with him. "Blimey!" Dudley yelped.

"Sorry Dudley." Harry said.

"How'd you do that?" Dudley asked.

"Called Apparation." Harry said.

"Like teleportation in Star Trek?" Dudley asked.

"A bit." Harry agreed. "Now, you're going to have to hang onto me, and don't move, we don't want to get splinched."

"What's splinched?" Dudley asked, grabbing his bag.

"I'll tell you later." Harry said. Dudley frowned slightly, but took Harry's hand. There was a sensation like being twisted inside out and his insides being twirled around while coloured lights streaked by him. Then the sensation let up and he could breathe again, blinking away the afterimages to find himself in a different hallway, lit by a chandelier and what looked like gas lamps.

"Here we are then." Harry said. "12 Grimmauld place, remember that. It'll only show up if you've got the address in your head."

"More magic?" Dudley asked.

"Yeah, it keeps the place from being detected by… undesirables, well, back when we were at war anyways." Harry explained. Right, Harry had been in war while Dudley had been what… worrying about whether or not he'd get another candy bar? His problems suddenly seemed so… childish.

"Do young Master Harry and young Master Dudley require anything to eat?" A tiny… thing that looked vaguely human with oversized ears and bulbous eyes peered up at him, frowning slightly. It had on a white tea towel in a toga-style and a large old locket hung around its skinny neck.

"In a bit, if you don't mind, Kreatcher." Harry replied. "Dudley, this is Kreatcher, he's a House Elf, he does the household chores and things."

"Wicked." Dudley said. "Got anything else hanging around?"

"No, there was a boggart, but it's gone now, you don't want to mess with one of those though." Harry said.

"Why not?" Dudley asked.

"Because they turn themselves into your biggest fear." Harry explained. "In my case, that would be a dementor."

"I think I can figure out why." Dudley said with a shudder.

"At least you can't see them, I can." Harry pointed out.

"Good point." Dudley replied, hefting his bag. "So where am I staying tonight?"

"Come on, I'll show you." Harry said. "Doubt you'll be sleeping much in it though." He chuckled. "I wouldn't eat too much before we leave, Mrs. Weasley always makes a lot of food and she'll insist on making sure we're constantly fed."

Dudley didn't mention that he could eat whatever Kreatcher made them and still have enough room for an all-you-can-eat buffet, but he didn't. He had learned that food was expensive, and that if he wanted his budget to last that he was going to have to pull back on snacking and take smaller portions. It wasn't as though he hadn't done it before, when he was fourteen he was put on a diet and his appetite had shrunk accordingly, but he could still eat a lot.

Of course he could have always just stayed home and mooched off his mum's cooking, or asked them to pay for things, which he was sure they would do. But that wasn't the point of getting his own place. He wanted to be independent, so he had resolved to learn how to control his food cravings.

"Is there anyone I should be worried about there?" He asked Harry, the thought having occurred to him. Harry paused on the stairs.

"Not sure what you mean." Harry admitted.

"I mean I'm sure you told stories about me to your mates, you don't think any of them will try to magic me into something nasty?" Dudley asked worriedly.

"No, they know I've been writing back and forth with you, and as far as people doing nasty things to me, you're not even in the top ten, Dud." Harry replied. "Don't accept candy from George though, he's one of the redheads, I'll point him out. You might remember him, he and his twin dropped a sweet that made your tongue grow."

"So why do I only have to watch out for George then?" He knew it was a stupid question as soon as he'd said it, but it was too late to take it back.

"Fred died." Harry said quietly, confirming his fears.

"Sorry Harry, I didn't think…" Dudley said lamely.

"It's fine, just don't bring it up at the Weasleys okay?" Harry said.

"Yeah, doubt that would go over well." Dudley said. They'd gotten to his room now, which was bigger than his room in his cramped apartment, which wasn't saying much.

"So, get settled in, get your good clothes on if you haven't got any, and I think we should get going right away. I'm sure Hermione's there already." Harry said.

"Sounds good to me." Dudley said.


	14. Chapter 14

Star: I own nothing!

Dudley's first impression of the Burrow was worry that the whole thing was going to fall over at any moment, though Harry reassured him that the place had survived seven Weasley children and was reinforced by magic. It was almost like someone had haphazardly stuck blocks of different sizes, shapes and colours one on top of the other with no regard for the effects that gravity might have. It was, in a word, brilliant.

His second impression, once inside the Burrow, was noise. There was yelling, a baby crying, footsetps on the floors above him, a kettle going off in the kitchen and just general talking and laughter. Dudley felt himself relax. This, this felt like a home, cozy and friendly and he grinned at Harry, who grinned in reply.

"So, what do you think?" Harry asked.

"This place is neat." Dudley replied. "There's a lot of people here already, isn't there?" The living room was stuffed full of people.

"Well, yeah, all the Weasleys, Hermione, Fleur, and Andromeda and Teddy." Harry replied.

"Harry!" Dudley moved out of the way as an otter with really bushy hair bounded up and hugged Harry. Hermione, he reminded himself. "You made it!"

"You thought I wouldn't?" Harry replied with a laugh. Hermione chuckled and then pulled back, extending a hand (paw?) to Dudley.

"Hermione Granger, you must be Dudley." She greeted him.

"Yeah, nice to meet you." He said, shaking her hand.

"Well, come on in then, everyone's here already." Hermione said, shoving them both towards the group of people in the living room. Dudley went, still feeling apprehensive as Harry received claps on the back, ruffles to his head and handshakes.

"Come on Dudley, come sit." Harry said, taking a space on a couch." Harry said.

"Yes, do sit down dear." An older witch with grey streaking her bright red hair said, bustling past him with a platter of pastries. Dudley sat on a chair beside Harry and watched as Harry accepted a baby who looked like he was at least half a year old, with bright green hair from another witch with curly black hair.

"This is Teddy, my godson." Harry said. Teddy gurgled happily and then his hair turned from green to bright red.

"Blimey!" Dudley said, surprised.

"Teddy's a Metamorphagus, means he can change his appearance at will." Harry explained, bouncing Teddy on his knee, making him squeal in laughter. "His mum was one too." Harry smiled, somewhat sadly and Dudley figured that she had been one of the ones to die.

His attention was attracted by a tall, willowy blonde that seemed to float into the room. His jaw dropped; he couldn't seem to look away from her and he was almost certain that he was drooling. Harry chuckled beside him and tapped him on the shoulder.

"That's Fleur, Bill's wife. Don't worry about your reaction, it's natural, she's part veela."Harry explained.

"Veela?" Dudley asked dazedly, watching as Fleur sat down next to a tall ginger man with a scarred face. "What happened to him?"

"Werewolf got him." Harry replied. "I'll tell you the whole story later."

"I think you need to tell everything one of these days." Dudley replied. Harry laughed.

"Alright, we'll pick a day, because it's a long, long story." He replied. "I think I'll need firewhiskey too."

"Speaking of which, here you are Harry." The red furred terrier Dudley recognised as Ron handed both Harry and Dudley a glass. Dudley took a swig and coughed.

"I can see why they call it firewhiskey." He choked out and then took another careful sip.

"That's the spirit!" Another redhead, this one with a manic grin and a missing ear, which meant he was George, said happily. "Have a couple of these, they're stuffed with raspberry." He added, shoving a plate of chocolate cupcakes at Dudley. Dudley eyed them suspiciously.

"Don't worry, mum would kill him if he was pulling pranks at Christmas." The horse, Ginny, said. She sat down beside Harry and tugged on one of his antlers playfully. Harry retaliated by tugging on her mane and then putting an arm around her. "Besides, Ron's been eating so many of those, if George had put something in them, he'd be the one to show it."

"Of course he'd probably get an even bigger dose simply because he's been eating so many of them." Hermione added, making everyone laugh.

"Oi!" Ron protested through a mouthful of pastry. "I don't eat that much."

"Yes, you're providing such a good case for that argument too." Ginny said, eying Ron's laden plate. "Just leave some for the rest of us, will you?" Ron made a rude gesture at her and Mrs. Weasley swatted him over the head.

"So how are those dragons of yours doing, Charlie?" The oldest redhead, who was probably Mr. Weasley, asked another redheaded man, this one stocky and muscular.

"Oh yeah, I forgot, Norberta's laid an egg." Charlie replied with a grin. "I bet that'll make Hagrid happy."

"Who's Norberta?" Dudley asked. Half the people in the room then took turns telling the story of Hagrid's failed attempt to raise a dragon for his own. They had to explain a few things here and there, but it was an interesting story all the same and somehow turned into an explanation for Quidditch and the various teams that one could support.

"Blimey and I thought football could be complicated." He commented.

"Well, with football you don't have to worry about falling off your broom." Ginny pointed out. "I'm going to be a professional player. Harry's deciding to take the safe route and be an Auror." She poked Harry in the side.

"Ha, safe. We'll come back home and count each other's scars at the end of the day." Harry joked in reply. Dudley bit into his cupcake, finally remembering that he had it.

"This is delicious!" He exclaimed, surprised by how good it really was. His mum usually just bought things like this, and they were good, but you could tell they were store-bought. Mrs. Weasley beamed at him.

"I'm glad you like them dear." She said.

"So, Dudley, you have one of those televisions, do you?" Mr. Weasley said, bright-eyed.

"Not in my apartment, can't afford the bill, but I did." Dudley replied.

"Ah, so you know how it works do you, how the images get on the screen?" Mr. Weasley asked eagerly. Harry had warned him that Mr. Weasley had a particular interest in Muggle technology.

"Er, not really. I mean I'm not that smart so I doubt I'd understand it if someone explained to me. I know a lot about cars though." Mr. Weasley's eyes lit up and Dudley found himself in a deep discussion on the merits of different types of engines until dinnertime rolled around.

The amount of food was incredible and by the time he was done Dudley felt like he was going to burst. It was still loud over dinner, so many conversations going at once. Hermione explained more about house elves and her ideas on how to get better rights for non-human intelligent creatures and Ron told him about the time they made a Polyjuice potion and snuck into the Slytherin dormitory.

It was completely unlike any family Christmas dinner he'd ever attended. Mostly the dinners with family meant boasting about their latest accomplishments and spreading gossip about each other. It certainly wasn't loud and it definitely wasn't so crowded. Dudley loved it, loved the atmosphere of peace that somehow managed to be there despite the chaos. It felt like home.

After dinner the younger crowd went outside in the dark, whooping and laughing and played in the snow. A snowball war was launched, after everybody agreeing not to use magic to make it fair for Dudley. A lively battle followed. First they attempted to divide up into teams and have strategies, but eventually it was just more fun to throw snow at anything that moved. Dudley's stomach hurt from laughing by the time they collapsed on the ground, exhausted.

Someone brought out a camera and they all struck a silly pose in the snow. Dudley got several pats on the back and even a few hugs as he and Harry left, burdened by a formidable package of leftovers from Mrs. Weasley.

"That," Dudley yawned as they got back to Harry's place. "Was the best Christmas ever."

"Well, I'm glad you liked it." Harry replied, yawning just as widely as Dudley had.

"I guess they're like your family, huh?" Dudley added, heading up the stairs. Harry paused for an instant, a soft, strange smile on his face.

"Yeah, yeah they are." He agreed. "Goodnight Big D."

"Goodnight Antlers."


	15. Chapter 15

Star: I own nothing!

"I can't believe I'm saying this, but I am so glad to be out of that house." Dudley sighed, leaning against the wall of 12 Grimmauld Place, his stomach trying to unknot itself.

"That bad, huh?" Harry asked with a chuckle.

"Aunt Marge asked about you." Dudley said with a shudder. "Only after she was drunk mind you. Dad made up some cock and bull story about you running away and they didn't know what you were doing anymore. Of course Aunt Marge immediately decided you were a drunk."

"Of course." Harry sniffed.

"It doesn't bother you?" Dudley asked.

"Why should it?" Harry replied.

"Bothers me." Dudley muttered. Harry clapped him on the shoulder.

"Congratulations Big D, you have a conscience." He said. "Now, what do you want to do today? We could go poke around Diagon Alley, Hogsmeade, could even introduce you to some of the blokes at the Ministry of Magic I know."

"Diagon Alley sounds neat, that's where you get all your magic stuff, isn't it?" Dudley asked.

"Some of it, yeah. Alright, we can play tourist today." Harry agreed. He held out his hand but then seemed to think better of it and grinned. "You want to go a different way?"

"Like what?" Dudley asked.

"Like the Knight Bus." Harry replied, grinning wickedly.

"I'm probably going to regret this, but okay, we'll do the Knight Bus." Dudley said. Harry grinned wider and headed for the door. "Hold on, won't someone see you if you go outside?"

"The front stoop's got spells on it so people can't see us if we're standing on it." Harry replied. "Muggles don't usually notice the Knight Bus either, but you're with me, so it shouldn't be a problem."

"Er, right." Dudley said. "Guess you lot have been hiding from us Muggles for a long time."

"Uh huh." Harry replied, stepping out the door. Dudley went with and watched as Harry flung out his right arm with his wand in his hand. After a moment a great big bright purple triple-decker bus pulled up in front of Grimmauld Place. Dudley could see a few other people walking the streets, but none of them seemed to notice the monstrosity idling on the curb.

"Come on Dudley." Harry said, hurrying to the open door. Dudley hurried after him. The doors shut immediately as he got on and the bus took off, throwing him forward and crashing him into one of the many chairs that was sliding around.

"Bloody hell!" He gasped.

"Just sit down and plant your feet, lean away from turns and just try not to fall over." Harry said, laughing a little bit.

"You are an absolute git for suggesting this." Dudley accused, but he was starting to chuckle.

"Maybe, but, Merlin's pants, you should have seen your face." Harry said, doubling over with laughter.

"I kind of wish I had now." Dudley replied, snorting with laughter. The ride wasn't any easier, and he kept getting thrown out of his seat at sudden stops, but they finally arrived at someplace called The Leaky Cauldron.

"Harry, I'm going to have bruises everywhere." Dudley complained, limping off the Knight Bus. "I'm never taking your suggestions again." He added. Harry just laughed at him.

"Come on you old man, come on inside." Dudley looked up at the sign, seeing the words the Leaky Cauldron there. The inside of the pub was a little dark and a little grimy, but had a welcoming air about it.

"Well hello Mr. Potter." The barman greeted Harry.

"Hullo Tom, how'd you know it was me?" Harry asked.

"Daily Prophet." Tom shrugged. "Who's your friend?"

"Dudley, my cousin, he's a Muggle." Harry explained.

"Ah, going to show him around Diagon Alley?" Harry nodded. "Well if you're up for it later come in and have a pint and lunch, on the house."

"Thanks Tom." Harry grabbed Dudley and led him to the back courtyard. He tapped on a few of the bricks on the wall and Dudley jumped as the wall seemed to slide right out of the way.

"I must look like a great big tit right now." Dudley said, staring through the hole with wonder.

"Trust me, I know how you feel. When I first stepped into Diagon Alley when I was eleven, I couldn't stop staring." Harry reminisced.

"Yeah, but I'm much older than eleven." Dudley pointed out. Harry shrugged.

"You get plenty of parents of muggleborn children who react the same way every year." He replied. "They'll more be staring at me than you anyways." He added, stepping through the hole in the wall. Dudley whistled appreciatively when he could see Diagon Alley completely.

"It does look quite nice in the winter." Harry agreed with a nod. Dudley could understand how Harry could be so calm about this place, after all he'd been coming here for years, but for him it was like discovering some new world. Everyone was wearing robes of varying colours, the shops were tall, some of them leaning and multicolored and advertised things that should not have existed.

"Harry, this is brilliant." He said.

"Yeah, it really is." Harry grinned. "If only you could see Hogwarts."

"Why can't I?" Dudley asked.

"All the spells in place, it'd just look like a ruin to you." Harry replied. "I could talk to McGonagall, see if there's a way that you could see it, because really, there is no place like it."

Dudley was having trouble thinking of somewhere that was even cooler than this place, so he stopped thinking about it before his brain melted out of his ears. Harry obliged him in taking at least a peek in every single shop on the street, even the boring looking ones, because, hey, it was a wizard shop after all, so that automatically made it more interesting than any shop that he'd been in.

"Didn't figure you for a reader." Harry commented as Dudley scoured the shelves in Flourish and Blotts. Dudley grinned sheepishly.

"Had to read the Hobbit for school this past year and actually found out I liked it. Started reading more after that." He explained. "What's this?" He asked, holding up a book entitled Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them.

"That's about all the different magical creatures there are in the world." Harry replied. "You want it?"

"Do they take pounds?" Dudley asked.

"No, but I've got money." Harry replied, digging out a few gold coins from his pocket.

"I'll pay you back." Dudley said.

"Consider it a Christmas present." Harry replied casually.

"That means I've got to get you something." Dudley said. "I don't even know what you like."

"Don't worry about it, Big D." Harry said, slinging an arm around his shoulder. "But, for the record, I like most chocolate and video games."

"I'll keep that in mind." Dudley said with a laugh. Suddenly Harry started waving madly.

"HAGRID!" He bellowed. A very, very big person turned up ahead and Dudley saw that they were in fact a bear.

"Harry!" Hagrid bellowed back, lumbering over to them both. "What're you doing here today?" He asked.

"Showing Dudley the sights. You remember Dudley, right?" Harry said, squeezing Dudley's shoulder.

"I do, lost some weight since then, and some o' that nastiness in your face." Hagrid replied. Suddenly it clicked.

"You're the one that gave me a pig's tail!" He gasped. Hagrid grinned, looking embarrassed.

"Never was very good with my temper, sorry 'bout tha'." He said.

"My dad had said something rude about Dumbledore, I remember that." Dudley replied. "You won't try to turn me into anything now, will you?"

"Naw, you're with Harry, so I reckon you're alrigh'." Hagrid replied. "Anyways, can't stay and chat I'm afraid, runnin' some errands fer Professor Sprout, poor thing's caught a nasty bug." Hagrid said. "I'll be lookin' fer a visit from you when you get back to school, Harry."

"I won't forget." Harry promised. He clapped Dudley on the shoulder. "Come on Big D, quit staring and let's find something to eat."


	16. Chapter 16

Star: I own nothing!

"Are you sure you want to know everything?" Harry asked for the thousandth time that day, settling down on one of the couches in the sitting room.

"Yes. I want to know." Dudley said firmly.

"It's a long story." Harry warned.

"What else do I have to do today?" Dudley shrugged.

"Alright, if you're so sure." Harry said. "Get comfy. I'm going to start at the very beginning, which is Voldemort. You need to know his story to understand mine. Ask questions if you want."

So Harry started with the story of a boy named Tom Riddle, who was different from other kids in the orphanage. He was told about a boy who hated his muggle father and that decided that muggles were lesser creatures, stupid and weak. He was told about the boy that became Lord Voldemort, the greatest Dark Wizard of their age.

"And you were up against that?" Dudley asked, aghast after hearing the types of things that Voldemort and his followers did. Harry nodded his head. "Bloody hell, Antlers!" Harry chuckled, but looked sad.

"My parents were the first." He replied. "I guess it runs in the family."

"So, what happened next?" Dudley asked.

Harry told him then about his parents, where James had come from, how they'd met. He told Dudley about the Marauders, about Remus' condition and his friends' determination to make sure he wasn't alone. He told Dudley about the friendship between Aunt Lily and a boy named Severus Snape, who became a Death Eater and then repented. He told him about a prophesy that marked him as Voldemort's enemy and how Voldemort had tried to end him, but failed. He was silent for some time after talking about his parents' deaths.

"It just seems so… wrong now, my parents saying yours died in a car crash." Dudley said hesitantly. "I mean, they were heroes, you deserved to know that." Harry just shrugged his shoulders. "But, how did you survive?"

"I'll come to that in a little bit." Harry said with a smile. "There's a lot more to cover before then."

Dudley listened as Harry told him about going to Hogwarts for the first time, about meeting his best friends in the world and how they found themselves in trouble time and time again. Dudley listened slack-jawed as Harry detailed battles with trolls, basilisks, dementors and Voldemort in various guises. He had to interrupt again when Harry told him about Cedric though.

"Cedric, I remember that one, I made fun of you for screaming for him in your sleep. Blimey Harry, I was a right arse." Dudley said apologetically.

"You didn't know." Harry pointed out.

"Doesn't make it right." Dudley replied.

"No, I suppose you're right. The sad part is, Cedric was only first person I saw die." Harry said.

With a heavy heart Dudley listened to Harry's story. He silently raged against Umbridge, who sought to silence him and then they had to stop as Harry's voice cracked, retelling the story of Sirius' death.

"Maybe we should have a break." Dudley suggested. "It's almost lunchtime."

"Yeah." Harry agreed, wiping at his eyes. "I think I'm going to need firewhiskey for the next bit, anyways."

They wandered into the kitchen where Kreatcher had sandwiches and vegetables waiting for them. "You know Harry, I used to hate vegetables."

"I know." Harry laughed. "What finally convinced you they weren't evil?"

"One of my mates on the school wrestling team was a big health nut and told us all everything that could go wrong with us if we didn't eat properly and I mean everything. Scared me so bad I went home and demanded we buy more vegetables and once I got eating them I realized they really weren't that bad after all." Dudley grinned. "It also helped that I started noticing I wasn't as tired or getting colds and flu or cavities as often either."

"You've grown up, Big D." Harry teased.

"Yeah well, had to happen someday, right?" Dudley replied sheepishly. "Too bad it didn't happen sooner, I mean I never knew how interesting you and your mates actually were and I'm not talking about the magic bit." Harry chuckled and finished his sandwich and then accepted a glass of firewhiskey from Kreatcher. "Thanks." Dudley said to the old house elf. Kreatcher nodded and hobbled away. "Are you ready?" Dudley asked Harry.

"No, but there's no sense in putting it off." Harry replied.

Dudley listened carefully, becoming more and more horrified by the notion of Horcruxes. He was even more horrified when someone else died; Albus Dumbledore. Tears were now sliding freely down Harry's cheeks and Dudley put out a hand to grasp Harry's arm.

"Harry, we can stop if you need to." He said pleadingly. "I'm sorry, I didn't know this would hurt you so much."

"No, I can do this." Harry said stubbornly, shaking his head. "I haven't talked about it to anyone, because everyone I know already knows in some way, and, this might sound crazy, but I think it's helping having someone to talk it out with."

"I don't know, Antlers." Dudley said doubtfully.

"Trust me, you'll know when it's too much for me." Harry said, smiling wanly.

"If you're sure…" Dudley said, letting Harry continue.

The next bit was even worse. It seemed like all last year Harry was just having people he cared about, and innocent people he knew by association die. Harry had to stop for a bit after talking about Dobby's death, but soldiered on, apparently determined to finish.

"Wait, you died?" Dudley interrupted.

"Technically." Harry replied.

"How're you still alive then?"

"It's sort of complicated, I'm not even sure I understand it completely, but the protection that kept Voldemort from touching me was sort of in him too, because he took my blood, and so he couldn't kill me, but he could kill the bit of himself that was in me." Harry said.

"I'm not even going to try to understand that." Dudley said.

"That's probably a good idea." Harry grinned. He continued on, the story winding down even as the battle picked up again, with everyone fighting against Voldemort and then finally Voldemort's death. Harry looked drained, but at the same time peaceful by the time he stopped talking.

"Huh, I guess that really was helpful." He said softly.

"Bloody hell." Dudley whispered. "All that time, fighting monsters and Dark Wizards, and I thought having no candy was the end of the world."

"Puts things into perspective, doesn't it?" Harry chuckled.

"Yeah, makes me realize what a prat I really was too." Dudley said sheepishly. "What do my parents have against magic, anyhow?"

"I know your mum was jealous of my mum and all the attention she got, but I don't know." Harry shrugged.

"Well, now that I've actually seen it and all, I think it's wicked." Dudley grinned. "How do you keep it all hidden?"

"Spells and laws and such. You should ask Hermione if you're interested, she'll know about it." Harry laughed. "She knows everything."

"I got that sense at Christmas." Dudley said, stretching and working the kinks out of his back. "So what's next for you?"

"Finish school, become an Auror, marry Ginny probably, have a few kids, you know, the usual." Harry said with a shrug. "And you?"

"Well, still looking into becoming a mechanic, as for marrying, maybe, maybe not." Dudley replied. "Do you think if I had a kid they'd have magic?"

"They might." Harry said.

"I'd be very proud if they did." Dudley admitted.


	17. Chapter 17

Star: I own nothing!

Dudley bounced a little as he helped set up decorations for the New Year's Party. He'd hardly eaten all day, claiming nausea and the closer it came to the party starting the more jittery he got. Harry didn't bother trying to calm Dudley's nerves, he was so wound up the words would just go in one ear and out the other.

"How many people do you think are showing up?" Dudley asked. Harry shrugged his shoulders.

"Probably everyone from the original DA, and then whoever they choose to invite, George is coming, so is Fleur and I think she said that Viktor was going to try and get here as well." He said. Kreatcher had been going mad all day, cooking and grumbling to himself at the same time, but had all but shooed Harry out of the kitchen when he'd asked if he needed any help. He always managed to get the strange elves in his life, didn't he?

"Hermione and Ginny should be along soon, should warn them not to go near the kitchen." Harry commented out loud.

"Thought Kreatcher was gonna throw something at you when you went in there." Dudley chuckled.

"He wouldn't have, but he definitely did not want help." Harry looked out the window. The sky was a soft greyish colour, the clouds fluffy and inviting. Already Harry could visualize snow falling on the ground, softening the edges of the world. It would make for a very pretty party, good for New Year's snogging.

"Tell you what, no matter how tonight goes, it'll still be better than a New Year's party with my parents." Dudley chuckled.

"I do remember those." Harry said. He didn't mention that he was usually confined to the cupboard at the time, but Dudley shuffled his feet nervously all the same. The front door opened and he heard Hermione call out.

"In the den, Hermione!" Harry called. Hermione came bounding in, her eyes alight. Ginny followed her at a slower pace, rolling her eyes at Harry. So Ron wasn't coming then.

"Hullo Harry, hullo Dudley. I have something for you actually." Hermione said, reaching into the small bag that she had over her shoulder.

"Hogwarts: A History?" Harry laughed when he saw what Hermione held out.

"He expressed interest in it at Christmas." Hermione sniffed daintily and glanced at Harry pointedly. Harry never did read the book and Hermione grumbled every time she referenced it and no one got what she was referencing.

"Well then, at least two people in the world will have read it then." Harry teased. Hermione let out a world weary sigh. Years of dealing with Harry and Ron had left her quite immune to the general stupidity of the world.

"Doing all the decorations by hand?" Ginny asked.

"Well, I'm not very accurate if I try to do them with a wand." Harry replied.

"I hope that isn't something that spreads to other areas." She commented wryly. Dudley nearly fell off the chair he was standing on, laughing so hard. Harry got it a moment later and began sputtering, trying to find a witty reply.

"Come on you two." Hermione sighed impatiently. "We've got work to do."

Harry could have sworn it was only moments later that people began arriving, but the clock on the mantle revealed the hours that had already passed. Ron, Seamus and Dean arrived first, yelling and hooting cheerfully and swaying a little bit. They'd been drinking already, then. More people began filtering in, Ernie, Cho, Luna and a host of others that Harry had seen the in DA but hadn't put names to faces quite yet.

His biggest surprise of the evening was when Neville showed up. "Hullo Harry, I didn't think you'd mind if I invited him." Neville explained, gesturing to Blaise Zabini, who was looking around the place with cool detachment.

"No it's fine, the more the merrier." Harry replied, getting over his shock.

"I hope then you do not mind that I brought along someone else." Blaise said, pulling Malfoy out from where he was attempting to blend in with the coats. Malfoy glared, but his whiskers were quivering and his tail was fluffed up to twice its size.

"Like I said, the more the merrier." Harry said. "There's lots to eat, Dudley an old boombox and some Muggle CDs and everyone's either laughing or dancing to the music."

"Sounds like fun." Blaise said sincerely. "Dudley is your muggle cousin, yes?"

"Yup, that's him." Harry said. "Not a problem, is that?" He said, gazing at Malfoy in particular.

"I should think not. We're all friends here." Blaise replied, giving Malfoy's shoulder a brief squeeze. Malfoy let out a sound like a yowl and glared at Blaise. "Come on, this is much better than listening to the adults complain at each other."

"Fine. Anyone hexes me, and I'm gone." Malfoy growled.

"Anyone hexes you and they'll be gone." Harry promised. Malfoy gave him an odd, searching look, but didn't say anything more. Neville grinned at Harry, shifting from foot to foot.

"Luna's up in the attic, looking for Prisruts, whatever those are." Harry told him.

"Oh, they're little mites that feed off Dark magic residue." Neville replied. "Thanks Harry." He wandered off, a skip in his step.

"He's got it bad." Blaise commented, moving past Harry and into the party room. He was greeted rather enthusiastically by Seamus and Dean, which was promising. Malfoy lurked on the edges of the party, shoulders hunched and eyes darting everywhere at once.

"You know if you keep looking like that George will probably prank you." Harry said, sidling up to Malfoy. Malfoy glanced at him and then away. "Why did you come if you weren't prepared to party?" Harry asked.

"Blaise convinced me to come." Malfoy said. He curled his lip up in a sneer. "It's not like I have many other friends besides him anymore, seems I'm rather unpopular these days." He gave Harry a pointed look.

"I think you'd be a lot more popular if you'd loosen up." Harry replied. "But, what do I know? Enjoy the party." He walked away, finding Ginny.

Dudley was a big hit that night, showing everyone how to dance to some of the Muggle songs, not afraid to look like a bit of a fool. "You call that dancing?" Malfoy scoffed. Harry was sure he'd had a few drinks, why else would he be talking to Dudley? Dudley whirled and faced him, grinning widely.

"What you think you can do better?" He challenged. "Come on, money where your mouth is, kitty cat!" Whether it was Dudley's taunt or Malfoy was taking Harry's advice, Malfoy all but glided into the middle of the room and began to dance. The two of them looked absolutely ridiculous gyrating around, but Malfoy was grinning like a madman and Dudley was laughing his head off, so no one cared.

"What is this rubbish, anyways?" Malfoy demanded above the music.

"Oi, that's the Rolling Stones, they're classic!" Dudley protested.

"Just because they're classic doesn't mean they're good." Malfoy countered. Dudley just laughed and kept dancing. It was possibly one of the weirdest things Harry had ever seen, but in a good way.

"Oh yeah, well who do you like then?" Dudley demanded.

"The Rhythmic Runes, the Weird Sisters, you know, good wizard bands." Malfoy replied haughtily.

"Sorry, I'm a muggle, can't listen to that stuff now can I?" Dudley finished off by doing an impressive break dance move that Harry hadn't thought he had the dexterity for. The crowd went wild and Dudley and Malfoy both were cheered and thumped on the back.

"Oi! The countdown's starting you lot!" George bellowed over the clamour. Everyone immediately shut up and began counting down the last minute. Harry felt a strange sense of anticipation wash over him. Maybe it was the fact that Malfoy had willingly talked to a muggle, or the fact that there were barely any fights in the corridors anymore between Houses insulting each other, or maybe it was just because this would be the first year that none of them had to worry about Voldemort anymore.

A clean slate, that was what New Year's was supposed to be. Like a phoenix bursting into flame and rising from the ashes it was the time when people could shrug off their mistakes and strive to be a new person. He grinned as the new year was rung in and was promptly grabbed and dragged into a forceful kiss from Ginny. Happy New Year indeed.


End file.
